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Jun 2020
Hello world, It's me again
Lil Miss temporary bliss.
I'll hold you close, I'll hold you dear
You can vent and scream, You can shed your tears
If you draw me close, You will feel my warmth
My love, affection, You'll feel a connection.

I'm also good at being a replacement
Tell me the deepest fears you keep locked in a basement
I'll listen and support you, I'll do all I can
So you can feel at home, have a safe place to land

I've felt pain in my heart, as I'll never be as good as the original
I'll never be as wanted or as loved, unlike the beloved
I'll never be the final piece, That perfect life where you will feel at peace

I'm but the second rate individual, the past time to heal your heart
After that very first one, torn you apart
And it's alright to seek safety, seek love within my arms
I'm the fool who believes it, believes it will last

I need to learn to stop forgetting
That I'm but a rebound, a temporary person
Because I'll never be loved the same
Never as valued like their persons

So forgive me, Lord, as I'm a fool
I need to learn my place
And you keep giving me reminders
But I get lost within that smiling face

And my face it burns, with hot tears streaming down
The end ticking nearer, but I refuse to drown
I've been used all up, my expiration date is here
This one wants to move on, to somebody who he actually holds dear

So here we go again, I'll be returning to square one
With a lot of excess baggage, and trauma. Fun.
Use me, abuse me, beat me till I'm blue
As my famous line goes

"As long as I can be of some use to you"


All I ask is that you love me
Want to be with me
Is what I'm asking really too much?

-
I'm fighting so hard to hang on to a person who doesn't even want me
I just want to be loved and wanted
Are the basic standards of a relationship just too much to ask?
Nyx
Written by
Nyx  21/F/Shadows of the Opera
(21/F/Shadows of the Opera)   
341
 
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