You tainted my soul,
You pretended to be the sleep I needed after years of ******* with insomnia.
Loving you made my mouth a ****** warpath.
My tongue bled from biting on itself,
See, you provided the bullets,
You said you kept me at bay,
I never knew at bay meant silent,
I never knew at bay meant surrender,
forgetting,
keeping still,
not knowing how to breathe,
Breathless,
Broken,
Edged scissors,
Slammed fingers,
Broken glass bottles,
Paper cut stains,
Shadow of a corpse,
I never knew at bay meant silent.

This war you’ve started has no means of ending,
This war you’ve started, I have not fought through.
I start swallowing so many ******* apologies that I’m sure my stomach’s about to burst,
I start forcing the hostility down my throat,
Till its sharp brittle edges make my muscles bleed.
I start,
And I cannot stop.
I start,
And I do not know how to stop.
I start,
And I do not want to stop.