Sometimes when I'm high I float
But not too far off the ground
But at times when I'm sober, I choke
I find it hard to keep the words down

Usually, it's not bad I don't even notice
Then I'm alone and it's all that I notice

These days I barely have a sober day
Afraid of the pain that doesn't exist
Lurking in the shadows barely at bay
I chased it away and yet it persists

I fight for no man yet I am fighting forever
In fear I plan yet I haven't put it together

I change on a whim and with no intent
You can't see when I see the loathing
I challenge the fact that I am spent
With a test that I myself had not chosen

Don't second guess the choice to choose
One slip of a tongue, the question is who's