today i am love sick
Yesterday i was reckless
This year i am entirely lost

I let my heart break so quick
I have been crying like a complete mess
My heart was frozen into a frost

I laughed when told to enjoy these moments
I cried when told these would be my best years
I broke because this has been the worst year of all

But now in this car the night soothes the torment
Because i realize from this hell trip that  I lived through so many fears
I braved through it and got up after every fall

No one would understand the terror in my mind
The sadness in my soul
The feeling of having your gut constantly churn

Sometimes i stop and feel  growth changing within my mind
I'm learning to let awful things go
Alanis morrisette really was right when she said you live and you learn

I am so reckless
I'm currently deeply heartbroken
A rising alcholic with noone to call my own
Crying at every failure


But I'll look back at this and learn it's ok to be a mess
Having my heart broke made my eyes open
I wanted to live life and I'm being shown
That to have fun and love I'll have to often be a total failure