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May 2018
I'm fine. 
That's my default answer. 
My answer to all the "how are you?"
How are you? 
That's what they usually ask. 

The question that I don't really know what to say. 
The question that I don't even want to answer
No. The question that I don't even want to hear.
That's why I just say "I'm fine."
I say I'm fine but I'm not so sure about that.

Some days I'm happy
Some days I'm positive 
Some days I'm a ball of sunshine
Full of laughter, smile, and cheerful vibe
Full of hope and full of love

But then dark days would come
Dark days when I feel gloomy
I feel sad
I feel like crying 
I feel like giving up
I feel hopeless 
I feel rejected 
I push people away
Days when I just want everything to end

A friend of mine once said that I'm a ray of sunshine
The one who can lighten up the mood and everything 
The one who's always cheery and happy

But you know what?
I don't think the same. 
I guess I'm more like the dark cloud. 
No, I'm a thunderstorm.
My mind's a storm. 
It's a mess. A complete mess. 

But I can't say all of this. 
I won't say any of this. 
No one would believe me.
So, instead, I'll say "I'm fine."
I'll pretend to be fine. 
I'll keep pretending.
Because that's all that matters, right?
People just need to hear those three words. 
"I am fine."
Written by
Elle
  327
   PoserPersona and HerStuntDouble
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