They say
actions speak louder than words
and if that’s true
I was screaming

Empty words
empty smiles
Haunted the last few years
of school
Somedays it was obvious
no talking
no smiles
no anything
but my “friends” didn’t notice
didn’t care
and the ones that would’ve cared
I didn’t go to

Fake gestures
fake friends
you said you cared about me
but you didn’t
you just wanted the math homework
inviting me over
was just for certainty

Anxious actions
anxious me
trying desperately
to keep these people my friends
but I couldn’t keep fighting
I was already screaming
help me
I’m hopeless, helpless, and scared
and they couldn’t hear me
so fighting and pleading
wasn’t worth it anyway

Leaving them
leaving fear
or so I thought
but years of fake friends
and unheard actions
unheard screaming
made me think
that my other friends
wouldn’t hear me too

Loving friends
Loving me
they heard me
they helped me help myself
and I don’t need to scream
and fight
and plead
anymore
because they hear me
before I even start
screaming