Losing hope, losing faith
I think it’s because I hate to wait
I hate to wait to be better
so I just cower
in my own pitiful  silence
I just let myself get eaten by despondence
Get numbed by insecurities
Get beaten by realities
of the illusion I’m in
of how I’m consumed by sin
and I don’t know how
How to get out now.

People are trying to pull me
But it seems that my body
my mind, my soul, my entire being
no matter how they want
to go back to the light
go back to His light;
they just can’t.
They can’t because it is the unity
of myself that don’t agree
It is within me that they choose to not flee
It is within me and the evil
the devil inside that puts me in peril.

I’m losing hope and I’m losing my faith
I know how to wait
It’s just that I don’t know
If I’m still waiting
For something
Some sort of miracle that will save me
Bring me to pinnacle and tame me
then cleanse me and make me worthy
of His love again
even if it’s the last thing I’d do before my end.

Lifeless and lost
And it’s all because
I don’t know what to do
My mind is chaotic
My heart is confused
My spirit sympathetic
My soul is chagrined
My body all drained.
How to redeem myself?
Looking at the bible sitting in my shelf
All dusty and torn
Like my loss, it mourns.

Is it still possible
Will I still be able
to just come back
even if I lack
the passion and the fire
that once ignited my love
and the music of the lyre
of my heart and my faith
or will I just be a wraith
to a stranger soon
like a silhouette on the moon
waiting for my end
to where I’ll be sent
accepting my fate
without any hate
just ready to take my flight
and end me being lost in the light.