At times I feel socially awkward hiding away those eyes from contact mumbling and stuttering as though I were stumbling, upon the words as I was discovering.
Please don’t think I don’t want to talk when I rush out, Please don’t think I don’t want to talk, when I don’t open your messages.
I escape out of nervosity I feel the fuzziness in my head butterflies in my stomach nervosity in my nerves lack of air in my lungs tremble in my muscles and the gritting of my teeth on my nails as it drains every ounce of energy out of me.
I hide behind shadows so I don’t encounter any social interaction.
No matter how many times I plan and play a conversation in my head I shudder and fret in reality, making myself look like an awkward mess.
I want to be friends I want to say hi but the words do not escape for I feel tongue tied.
I feel conscience and dreadful for being such an awkward mess choking on words unable to let them escape my tongue.
I am thinking more than I am speaking I can have a conversation in my head but somehow, I find it difficult in reality.
But then you reach out and make the first move It makes it easier; only to find myself being an embarrassment once again.
But you don’t judge you play it cool and remain patient you still show an eager to talk and maybe that was what I needed to be comfortable and me.