I know how it feels
To look in the mirror and get chills,
Not the good kind
The ones that consume your mind.

I know what it’s like to look at scars.
My heart and my arms are marred.
And the mirror
Brings about tears.

And it hurts
When the pain sticks to you like damp dirt.
And you can’t love the things you used to
Because this feeling is taking over you.

But that’s why it’s important not to fake a smile.
And why you need to be honest once in awhile.
I get it, when the hurt gets too much.
I escape, try to find me in a crowd and I’ll duck.

I avoid.
And it’s an active choice.
But I’ve learned it doesn’t change anything.
And I’d rather know and see someone’s demons
Than see a fake smile, even if it’s bright as the sun.