My mind's a Tetris I can't solve.
Puzzle pieces with no straight edges.
Always a vowel short on the Scrabble board.
Three in a row when all I need is four.

I am cold,
Or maybe just hollow.
But I can feel the change as the duvet smothers my shell.
My external is warm but still
I am cold.

Watching the sun rise through salty, stained glasses.
I laugh with a cider smile as my heart forms ***** tears.
This is a pain that knows nothing of its root.
A blank smile.

There is a weight on my chest.
Or not, maybe I'm pushing out.
I'm not me, you see.
Well, obviously I am but the real me is safe,
The real me is secure and organised and knows what's happening.
But the now me doesn't know,
And the real me has no control.

I am a self confessed mess,
So please wait this out with me.
One day maybe I'll be good again
But for now,
I am a self confessed mess.