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Nov 2017
this reminds me of you,
you exist.

i resist, but my eyes insist
to take a look one more time,
and then one more-
i think i'll lose my mind
before i go blind,
and then i'll be sure;
you were never mine,
and that's all i know-
no love to breathe,
only this hatred deep inside
to feed, monsters and ghosts,
****** and witches to bleed-
i keep myself
from the outside now.


i sleep without a word,
lonely and cold-
so worthless and vile
the world laughing at me
all this while,
and i sit here, to be sold
face my exile-
a face with no smile,
only distance and walls,
stares at me as if he's watching
something coming back to life,
something that must've died
a long time ago, here's a man
turned into a monster for the show,
here's the man, i see everyday
here's the man who speaks to me
in whispers, i see him in the mirror,
everyday, every-way i walk,
there's something wrong with me-
and it won't stop, oh no, it won't,
my brain would rot and my heart
will be caught on fire.

there was more than love for you,
there was more than desire and
now i cannot explain how lonely
i am here without you,
without your lies, and the liar.

i see what isn't in the mirror,
my mind playing tricks-
i'm always so sick, with a
picture playing in my head,
like a song-
if i don't get rid of it,
i know i'll always be torn.

always in a mourning,
for a want, at a place
no one belongs-
nobody to rescue
somebody to haunt,
there's always a human
inside, hiding somewhere
in the wrongs,
toiling the sky, spoiling
the earth with his arms
hypnotic and strong,
nobody believes in a home
where nobody stays for long.

the world is so static,
there is still a portrait of you
in the attic of my heart,
i thought i was done with
them stones and sticks-
when i found you,
and now when i remember it,
everything is so erratic-
maybe it was a curse,
maybe it was poison
could it be magic,
what was it ?


that made every good memory
i had so tragic-
stained by the ugliness of
your beauty, and a knowing,
that you must be
at a better place now,
outside, and i can't take it.

it reminds me of you,
you exist.
aviisevil
Written by
aviisevil  28/M/india
(28/M/india)   
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