I'm feeling hesitant
To ever fall asleep
Again, let alone tonight

I can't stop wondering

This thing inside a hollow casing
That I call me
Begs for nothing
Nothing.....

I can't believe its almost four fifteen
And the sun is already glowing outside my window

I hate you and I just want to be alone....

Why can't I be alone

Its your fault I hate myself, I hate that you exist, get out of me
I don't want to live this

Four fifteen

Blazed in crimson over my digital alarm clock
I barely hear the noise, the thoughts crowding out of my  head

*******, I just want to be alone
Alone
Alone
Alone
Alone

****

I pry myself up
A headache unrealized blinds me for more than a second
Do I look in the mirror....

Seems like an easy choice, but I still choose wrong

My feet barely keep balance as I stumble over clutter
Things left to remind me of the lack of progression

Head pounding, blood crawling
Life at a standstill
---------
Smile
--------
Pass out on the couch, get up hours later
Missed my buss
****
Better just shoot myself