I'm waiting to get sick
so I can die without doing it myself
without a mess, lying in a bed
with the blankets tucked in around my head
I think I might be sick
or maybe I'm just being hopeful
that this will be over quick
maybe they could catch it early if I cared
but it's very hard to see myself anywhere
but lying down, somewhere dark and underground
or maybe in a jar on someone's shelf

-- who am I kidding, I'm a closet girl