|Written by early 2012|
(possibly written Oct. 3, 2011)

**Story**
Like many of my 2011 & 2012 poems, this was written amidst pain from a devastating heartbreak. I'd started developing some resentment and anger in the pain at this point, and began this poem by simply describing how I felt emotionally, through the imagery of physical torture.
I was very religious, and partway through this poem I began "hearing the voice of God" (as I used to be trained to often interpret many spiritual thoughts and emotions) and the direction of the poem changed, as I remembered the Christian conviction to have love and forgiveness for others because I myself am not perfect and yet had been allegedly forgiven even by my perfect savior. The imagery quickly shifted in my mind as I realized how well the chorus I had written applied to the image of Jesus being crucified. My emotion had changed from anger in the beginning, to joy at the end. I truly think these values of humility and forgiveness are some of the best effects of Christianity. That is a lesson I hope to learn more of in the future. It has helped me much in the past to be a better person.
To clarify, Christians believe that everything each individual does wrong, every sin, contributes in someway to why Jesus allegedly had to sacrifice himself. Additionally, shame of my personal struggles was still a pretty heavy weight on me at this time.

**Trivia**
If I recall correctly, this is one of the only poems I've ever written pretty much straight through, in one go. Eventually a few subtle changes were made, but this poem has essentially always been completed in about the same form from the minute I finished, and I finished it without stopping from the moment I started. It's practically pure free-flowing thought as I had it that night, captured in text.

___

© 2017 A.D. Sifford
I'm okay with you sharing my poems, but I ask that you show courtesy. Please be honest about the authorship by attributing it to my name. Thank you,
- Sifford