Have you ever had those days that just ******?
Those days that were just terrible and you have no idea why.
Why they are bad, why it's happening to you and why does it keep getting worse?
You just constantly ask: why?

Why do we have bad days?
Are bad days a type of requirement to living?
Do we have to experience bad days?

And why the hell do I experience them day after **** day?

For the past few months I've had bad days.
My days are like, real bad.
As bad as criminals locked away in the world's deepest prisons.
As bad as lying in court, or swearing in church, or sleeping with your neigbor.
Well, maybe not the last part, because if that was what I was comparing my bad days too, at least I'd be getting lucky in some sort of way.

My days are terrible.
I have chronic anxiety, top that with separation from my loving family, add in being a freshman in college, make sure you include dealing with the death of my mother, and top it all off with just a general sense of feeling alone.
This is what my bad days are like.

My bad days are horrible.
They make me feel sad.
And lonely.
And depressed.
And at times I think my heart actually hurts.
I can feel the physical pain in my chest.
It's like no matter where I turn or what I do, I can't find anything to help me.
From kids laughing, to girls being in a relationship with someone else,
(Like seriously, every girl is with someone),
All the way to knowing I lost my best friend when my mother passed away.

What can I do to get away from these bad days?

I go home, exhausted after each day of bad.
I breathe heavy not only from the long walks of this college campus, but the burden that surrounds my heart.
I just cry now.
It just escapes my eyes and my soul.

I eventually end up all alone, like usual.

And all I do is think to myself:

"Man, I've had a bad day."

And then I just say to myself:

*"Man, I've had a bad life."