There is a vacancy in my heart,
One that tears me apart.
A vacancy in my soul,
A gaping, ghastly hole.

I am shoveling things into the spot,
Oh how resiliently I have fought.
Yet the world does not see me suffer,
Its forces in response become tougher.

I am tempted to taste forbidden fruit,
Dagger, pills, then dresses and suits.
Solemnly bowed heads, grieving eyes,
A weeping woman whom I despise.

Alas, I would not see these things,
These awful things that funerals bring.
Like ants from the woodwork they'd appear,
As if they ever cared about my fear.

Mommy, drink another beer.
Go ahead and do it.
Mommy, cast another leer.
You will regret it.