Dec 2015
Today like many days now
for at least
three hundred & sixty five days
plus some more
I've thought about you
I've thought of
the many times
you've made me smile
laugh and the few times
you've made me cry
Today's an ordinary day
but we've not ever been ordinary
more likes extraordinary
yet I most of the time
didn't have enough in me
to give to you
I loved you & love you still
See this is my problem
and as I've been told
most man need to fix something
No matter if it's emotional
mental and or otherwise
You can't fix me
The support I craved
you'd give in increments
but gave none the less
Today like many days now
I think about the times
spent mainly in the car
how you'd sooth my fears
or the time we got stuck by
my house
but we made the most of it
as we danced in the rain
I think of us and what we could of been
if we'd of both let go
just give in
yet too much happened
to the both of us
before we even knew one another
star-crossed lovers before time met space
and we drifted together like
a meteor colliding in space
I often think back
on where we'd be
if I could of gotten
myself together
held my tongue
kept my anger in check
much more
Today like many days now
for at least three hundred & sixty five days
plus some more
I've thought about you
like when we first made love
I doubt I'll ever forget the shock
of finding out you did
know enough
Your sweet word surely
wasn't just
spoken
out of lust
We made magic and made history
a part of you & a part of me
God made these things possible
oh how I think if ONLY
Today like many days now
I think of the passion we had
for one another
the way you kissed me
in places that made
my head spin
sent chills down my spine
and all over my body
I cried out over & over
I remember every gentle touch and
for me I'd of liked
to see you be a bit rough
Maybe just maybe
I should of enjoyed it more
allowed you to
teach me something new
because now a days
I think back on it
and you knew
yeah you knew
all the right things to do
thing's I just wasn't ever used to
Today like many days now
I think of the ways we held each other
You more than me
have held me through-out
the night
whispering sweet word
as you'd caress me to sleep
or saving me often from a bad dream
I think back and see you in my
minds-eye massaging all my pain
and fears away
Often times reassuring me you'd never leave
I feel cheated out of these thoughts and all the
beautiful memories we've made
all the history we had and the many
we would have still
if only I'd of changed sooner
or if I'd had given in better
If I'd of allowed what you were offering
things would be so different
I'm glad you're happy
content & in love
sharing our dream
with a new lady love
OH how I wish it was me still
how I used to believe it'd be me again
I think on how I've waited jaded for you
to come home
but you never did
and wont ever again
I'm no longer yours but
Today like many
days now
for at least
three hundred
& sixty five days
plus some more
I've thought
About You
Copyright ©
Ayeshah K.C.L.N 1977-Present
All right reserved
for at least
three hundred & sixty five days
plus some more
I've thought about you
I've thought of
the many times
you've made me smile
laugh and the few times
you've made me cry
Today's an ordinary day
but we've not ever been ordinary
more likes extraordinary
yet I most of the time
didn't have enough in me
to give to you
I loved you & love you still
See this is my problem
and as I've been told
most man need to fix something
No matter if it's emotional
mental and or otherwise
You can't fix me
The support I craved
you'd give in increments
but gave none the less
Today like many days now
I think about the times
spent mainly in the car
how you'd sooth my fears
or the time we got stuck by
my house
but we made the most of it
as we danced in the rain
I think of us and what we could of been
if we'd of both let go
just give in
yet too much happened
to the both of us
before we even knew one another
star-crossed lovers before time met space
and we drifted together like
a meteor colliding in space
I often think back
on where we'd be
if I could of gotten
myself together
held my tongue
kept my anger in check
much more
Today like many days now
for at least three hundred & sixty five days
plus some more
I've thought about you
like when we first made love
I doubt I'll ever forget the shock
of finding out you did
know enough
Your sweet word surely
wasn't just
spoken
out of lust
We made magic and made history
a part of you & a part of me
God made these things possible
oh how I think if ONLY
Today like many days now
I think of the passion we had
for one another
the way you kissed me
in places that made
my head spin
sent chills down my spine
and all over my body
I cried out over & over
I remember every gentle touch and
for me I'd of liked
to see you be a bit rough
Maybe just maybe
I should of enjoyed it more
allowed you to
teach me something new
because now a days
I think back on it
and you knew
yeah you knew
all the right things to do
thing's I just wasn't ever used to
Today like many days now
I think of the ways we held each other
You more than me
have held me through-out
the night
whispering sweet word
as you'd caress me to sleep
or saving me often from a bad dream
I think back and see you in my
minds-eye massaging all my pain
and fears away
Often times reassuring me you'd never leave
I feel cheated out of these thoughts and all the
beautiful memories we've made
all the history we had and the many
we would have still
if only I'd of changed sooner
or if I'd had given in better
If I'd of allowed what you were offering
things would be so different
I'm glad you're happy
content & in love
sharing our dream
with a new lady love
OH how I wish it was me still
how I used to believe it'd be me again
I think on how I've waited jaded for you
to come home
but you never did
and wont ever again
I'm no longer yours but
Today like many
days now
for at least
three hundred
& sixty five days
plus some more
I've thought
About You
Copyright ©
Ayeshah K.C.L.N 1977-Present
All right reserved
I forgive myself even if YOU never do and I also learned to forgive others, its still a work in progress but I'm heading to a better me and glad I've learned these lesson so the next one if ever i find another wont suffer from my bitter contempt. Thankfully I ain't looking for another just enjoying me!
