The trees talk to me in my sleep. Sometimes the walls do too.

Sometimes the tree's and the walls talk to each other while I just listen. I can't speak their language, but I know they are speaking about something amazing. I tried to learn languages. Spanish, latin even, but none of them seem to stick. I feel like I'm drowning, and then I begin to float only to drown again.

I lose myself sometimes, and bread crumbs don't help me find my way back. I get scared most of the time as well. Everything scares me and it's a waste of time to scream all of my fears so I keep them under my skin. I feel so small sometimes, and then I don't. Sometimes I believe I drank the growth potion like that ******* Alice and everything is too small for me. But then I shrink, and I feel insignificant as a piece of dust in the sunlight.

Because who really cares about one dust in the sunlight? Sure it's pretty, but you don't take the time to wonder about where it came from and how it got there. It's a stupid, little piece of dust. That's what I feel like.

Besides all the times I feel disconnected from myself and the world, there are times, moments I guess you would say, that I feel like I was meant to be there. There are times where I believe whoever is up there is actually paying attention to me and not regretting. But thats only for a small moment. Did I mention that I'm usually sad? The weirdest things make me sad, and the weirdest things make me happy. I think whoever made me did it with their eyes closed for ***** and giggles.