Hey dude, you are so undesireable yet you sit here as to say, "Hey, I know you want to **** me, I would too!" But sweetie, we don't. We could not care any less.
Yes, I want you as much as a tuba likes a pp. And you are as useful to me as mezzo forte is to the color guard.
Take a breath, sweet thang, and swallow that love in your heart which happens to be only filled with you, yourself, and hey what do ya know, more YOU.