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Jan 2015
Sorry.
Five simple letters with the ability to twist my tongue into a jigsaw no **** kid would have the audacity to crack.
I'm sorry for never telling you I loved you.
I'm sorry I was so fixated on being destroyed that I couldn't comprehend that you could have kept me safe.
I'm sorry I check my heartbeat like clockwork,
But the aftermath of every close call is a permanent feeling of running out of time.
I apologize for holding your hand like your skin could possibly be anything but desirable to me.
Truth be told
I always liked the way you felt like an inside-out cigar.
I miss the way you breathed my pain like it was second hand smoke.
I'm sorry all I had to offer you was a busted frame and a hollow interior.
And I'm sorry I was too afraid to even give you that.
I'm sorry I treated your patience like a burden
For making you believe your smile was something I could choke on.
You were my proof that happiness doesn't only come in pill form
And I've been trying to drown these butterflies you left running through my head.
I killed the ones in my stomach the first time you put your arm around me.
I'd give anything to have them back.
All I seem to be able to say lately is "I'm sorry". I think I'm just trying to make up for all the times I'll never get to say it to you.
Dust Bowl
Written by
Dust Bowl
648
       ---, allison and Joseph Schneider
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