I still think of you
in the middle of class, in the shower at 11 am, in my sleep
sending guilt cascading through my body
like poison I cannot flush out
I shiver at the thought of how I let you touch me
how young I was, how naïve
all excuses
I knew what I was doing
degrading myself to the point of no resurrection
nobody will touch me now
I am not only tainted skin, but a tainted mind
you flood my pores, bleed from my eyes
I am the same girl you left behind three years ago
that alone kills me everyday
knowing that I exist in the same corpse you loved
knowing that we walk the same land
knowing you are so far from me
and I still think of your hands
it tears me apart