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---- Feb 2015
i'm so ******* sick
of always being the one
to ask the questions.
why won't anyone
just ******* ask me
what makes me happy?
why won't anyone
just ******* ask me
how i'm actually doing?
why won't anyone
just ******* ask me
how much it hurts
to hear nothing but
doubt when you
ask yourself if
you matter enough
to keep going.
---- Feb 2015
i've always
been okay
with being ordinary
but now i'm starting
to find holes
where happiness
should be
---- Jan 2015
when the sun sets
and everything turns
to silhouettes,
i know that darkness
falls close behind.
---- Jan 2015
i'll never
fit in,
and i'll never
stand out.
all i'll ever do
is exist,
and i just
don't know
if that's enough
---- Jan 2015
this winter is a
rough one,
ice cold isolation
echoes inside
my body through
mazes of bones,
like loneliness
flooding through
city streets.
i can hear these
icicles begin
to shiver,
begging for me to
bring them inside,
but i think that
i'd rather just
stay out here.
this cold is
all that i have
ever known,
and the only way
that i know how
to live.
---- Jan 2015
it hurts so much
to see someone
you love fall
out of your life,
but it hurts even
more to know
that you're
the one who
pushed them.
---- Jan 2015
i'm losing it again.
everything that
i worked for,
everything that
i tried so hard
to keep close,
i can feel
it all slipping
from my fingers
and i just can't
seem to get a grip.
everything is
moving too quickly
and i'm losing control,
because reality has
started to distort
and thoughts
are beginning
to take over.
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