this is not a goodbye,
this is my death, the epitome of my burried-7ft-under-the-ground
naive with both eyes wide ******* open
this, i said, is not a goodbye
this is my war, another version of daily sword cry between my body and the body of my body
both bleeding, both pleading
this, my friend, is never what a goodbye should look like
this is just me, hanging, begging, knocking and crawling,
just another tv show about breaking plates, or lost planes, or abandoned planets
just another boring 195 minutes episode of empty asylums, dry lips, and false alarms

or this is
the paragon of your goodbye,
alongside with my everyday asked question of “so what comes after death?”
or “how many nights was it my mom cried after the divorce?”
or “how do two souls that used to see each other bare drift away with full armor of clothes?”
or how much more do i have to pour, because i have dried all of my words, and metaphor,
there's only so many ways of describing how it feels like to be destroyed

(but this is time for me too to realize that without a goodbye, it's still
you
and me going straight back to
0
or -1
or -100)

i understand so this is your way of saying goodbye ; not even saying it at all
so there was no closure
just me left confused in a never ending roller coaster ride
so this is your way of saying goodbye ; you ******* erased the word 'good' out of it

walking alone
in the woods
at night.......
raining....or
dangerous sounds
have the habit of
rushing  toward tree
an awareness......... felt
the invisible hands
of tree
hugging and
protecting me from danger.

faith
you
light up
my life
tonight
and
my
soul rush
to the stars

let’s be love letters
written to broken hearts
with words of kindness, of grace,
of hope.
let’s be love songs
that play over and over,
that echo in every soul.
let’s be shoulders to lean on,
open wide arms,
open wide hearts.
let’s be lights
that lead each other home.

i love me like this,
with the night in my eyes
and the cinnamon moon
that sits atop my nose.
i love me like this,
with my wild and untamable curls,
who only listen to the wind.
i love me like this,
with my skin that matches
the café con leche i love to drink.
i love me like this,
with my poetry and without her;
with the words i feel
and the words i’ve kept to myself.
i love me like this,
light and free;
because this is who i am,
this is who i was made to be.

you are the sky
and your smile is the sun
and i hope every day
to see the sunrise on your skin,
to see your lips dance
as you let the light in
you are the sky
and your eyes are the stars
and i wish upon them every night.

Sometime ago she existed,
trailing length of sky blue silk
milky pearls and jasmine flowers
twinkling wrinkles around starry eyes,
as she humbly gazed up towards a
full and sensuous moon
amidst the crumbling city walls,
the ever changing landscapes of
destruction and remorse,
sometime ago he existed,
folds of white linen
perfectly creased pants and
sturdy mass boots fitting strong legs,
he stood raising towards the
almighty fiery sun,
taking the vows of a greater
spirit and an honorable duty
amidst the hurling arrows,
jabbing swords and
doubtless bullets,
sometime ago I understood
what it meant to be a good person,
what to believe and how to behave,
but now I can no longer hear
the cry of my inner spirit,
the sound of the crashing waves,
the desolate sorrow of the
greater good's longing,
I can't tell of whether
nice or awful people,
can't speak words of hope
and expressions of gratitude,
can't see straight in the eye
of those blind who were once
able to see because I have
became a person who used to see
but is now blind and deaf,
I don't know how to answer
the world anymore
because I lost myself
a long time ago,

But sometime ago
I existed.

in the darkness
there are shapes of color
working together as a machine
whos only function
is to keep the shapes
together in motion.

the purest thoughts ive seen.
shapes without words.

love -
an emotion filled with desire
well i desire you.

its you i want
breathing your deepest drowned secrets in my ear
telling me you never loved anybody this much
stroking my hair in the hot, hot sun

love -
an emotion filled with trust
well i trust you.

its you i want
knowing when I'm not ok
kissing me to wipe my tears away
thinking of me when you're not here with me

love -
an emotion filled with affection.
well, i wanna affect you

its you i want
thinking of me when you're with her
missing me when you're all alone
dreaming of me because you aren't here.

where are you?

i love you.