This body
These limbs
Those second hand organs
Part buckshot
Together forming a symphony
Of bad decisions
Inflating the punching bag lungs
Behind my sewer grate rib cage

Persuading my blood
To stay on track
With the veins i've been given
Finding embrace in fires
I can't put out yet
Boiling reasons to feel again
Falling thrift shop short
Heart lunging out
For new parts

Is
A
Holy
River
In
Which
You
Have
To
Dive
Into
When
Life
Gets
Dry,
And
Moisture
Is
Lost!

I have seen the bliss
before the morning's dawn .
I have taken kiss from a woman
as she slept like a new born fawn .
I have seen the sun and moon set
together in a western sky .
I have seen all the reasons now
as we let our loving die .

I have seen the fog at times when
there was nothing one could see .
I have seen eternity from the mountains
all the way down to the sea .
I have seen love's kind embrace and
felt it's breath upon my skin .
But I don't even dare to dream
there will be another like you again .

Oh , I have seen paradise through
The yellow of the glass .
Tasted it upon my tongue
And it was so very nice .
I have smelled the rose's fumes
And it permanates the air
For evermore I assumed
But now face cold realities stare

I have seen the petals fall
one by one by one
I have seen the fingers slip away
until there were none .
I have this empty feeling
at the bottom of my pit
God it is so unwilling
I think I'm feeling sick

Our love has evaporated
After summer's rain  
Leaving steaming memories
Heat and searing pain
But I have not seen
Nor think I ever will
See a love again like this
Forever that's so real

What is anxiety?
Is it but a name of an illness?
Am I it's proprietary?
If so how could anyone miss?;
All that goes on with me?
Can they not see?
My beating heart wanting to escape,
This doomly fate,
That is only but in my head,
As my horrors I have fed:
With my hopes and all my dreams,
It's what it seems.
Why can't others see the breath stuck mid chest,
Do I seriously look like the rest?
Breathing happily,
Carelessly?
Can't you see?;
This thing suffocating me?!
It doesn't even stop there,
As it covers my blank stare,
So nobody notices,
That it's main torture is;
Through using my own mind to drive myself insane.
And from this there is absolutely nothing to gain,
But hurt sadness and pain,
Making my existence nothing more important than a stain.
Why can't you see?
Why can't you help me...?