There Was A Good Guy
Who wanted to laugh
Who wanted to spend time
With people
Who wanted to have fun
Who wanted his life
Not to be so sad
And maybe he felt
A bit akward with his body
Or a bit out of place
In this world
He saw a therapist once
Who listened and left
I'm ready
For new experiences
But they never come
I watch funny comedies
Better to laugh
Than to sob
The afterlife must be nice
Or simply not to exist at all
Some may think that will happen
But I can't
That's what I'm doing here
Here and now
Not existing at all
Shut up in my room
Like Emily Dickinson
And there's always more
More of the body
I don't much care for
More time alone
More IPad hours
There is always more
Of the same
I'm grateful to the people
That comment on my poems
I really am grateful
Just one big empty world
Full of emptiness
Like some meaningless
Computer
Do I exist at all?
No, not really
I get my sense of self
From relationships
And human interaction
Okay Jesus guy
I'm waiting for you
To answer my prayers
About the loving female?
Oh that's right
You don't really answer prayers
For good genuine people
Like me
I've carried my cross
Just like any other soul here
I can ask kindly
Or in a more demanding tone
Doing the same thing
Over and over
And expecting different results
Was it Freusd who said
That was the definition
Of insanity?
Poor Matt
Poor Lonely Matt
Behind the Glass Walls
There is the world
And there is me
Behind the glass walls
Trying to make a connection
To something real
To something genuine
Tomorrow will I
Scale the heights
Of the mountain
I don't know
Perhaps I will
In the cold snow
Just wanted to lie down
With a woman to hug
There are something like 3 billion
Women on this planet
And I can't find or get one
Single one
By chance or circumstance
Just to hug and to hold
One day the world will end
They'll drop the bomb
The A-bomb
Crying and screaming
Can be heard throughout
The land
I lived some life
Close to the source
Of all life
Wandering in the mountains
I didn't meet my friend
Like I was supposed to
All I had was the hope
I'd meet someone
Why do I feel akward
In this body
Am I just a thinking brain
Just a brain?
I want to know people
I want to share laughter
Like the Buddhist monks
Of Tibet or Nepal
Like the Samoans
Or Scilians
Like the Portugese
Or Polish
You know what people do
Have dinners together
And relationships
And friendships
It's not just a fantasy
People do that
In other cultures
They love each other
They spend time with each other
They hug each other
Where is my hug
I face the sun
Waiting for the hug
That never comes...