This is not the first
Not even the second
Honestly I lose count
So can I count on you

It's like we used to
Had a conversation
Calm and **** one
Yeah I'm into you

The grass turns greener
Everytime we're together
The cloud looks prettier
When your head's on my shoulder

I miss this
I miss us
I miss everything
Includes the taste of your lips

I feel better off dead
broken promises of those who I loved dearly
feeling invisible & their actions stated clearly
that I was only needed when on their time
so I struggle to survive most of my days feeling my soul dying
from trying to love as I said I would
but yet, my heart remains ignored & misunderstood.

I feel better off dead
drinking heavy & contemplating on suicide
waiting to go home where the other departed souls reside
wanting to get high just to ease the pain within
caused by enemies posing themselves as friends
I see that monster in my eyes but I refuse to let unleash it
feeling like it’s just evil provoking & I can beat it
but I keep losing control every tear I shed
from thinking how life will change once I’m dead
free from the pain, free from the hurt
no longer living with fear that one day my heart will deperse