And tonight I am not sleeping alone
Tonight I will be sleepless but not without dreams
Two burning things will make love to me
One is you and the other is the ache from imagining us.

My body longs to lick your soul
To see beneath your eyelashes
And to feel your heartbeat drowning mine
But no. Not tonight.

And when it's daybreak
And the sheets are without a single crease
Then I will let my happiness go
And fully admit that I can only burn with you.

"just try not to give a ****."

I try and I try and I ******* try.
But all I do is give a ****.
I care so ******* much that it claws up my throat until it feels like I can't breathe.
I care about anything that goes through your stupid ******* head, even now, when I know you could give a ****.
I don't want to anymore.
I don't want to want you anymore.
Your apathy drowns me.

My eyes wander to the white wall
To the uneven ceiling
To the piled books and ***** laundry
Untouched like the tangled wires
Like a necklace under my chin.

And finally I'm flying
Away from this world
Of indifference and guilt
Yes, everything looks so mundane up here.

Love is graceful this time
It left me marks and bruises
Not from anger but from
Fighting too hard
And from breathing too fast
To get to you and to finally rest
With my face buried in your hands.

I hope I can compose
A melody out of this screeching pain
So I can play it to you even while you sleep
So you can feel your ears bleed like how my heart did.

I hope you'll dream of me
Thrusting notes down your throat
And I won't stop even after the curtain closes
Until you get it right. Until we get it right.

Because this love is obsessive
It's destructive than nuclear weapons
Hiroshima and Nagasaki combined
Can't compare to our aftermath.

God bless my soul
When I reach for you
A fruit with the snake
Hissing and enticing me
To take a bite
Taste the sin

I guess the heart is made that way
Wanting what's forbidden
And sin tastes like cherry with wine
With an appetite that can drown the town.

And weeping won't cure you.
God doesn't care.
And Eden is closed to those who are drunk
But darling, we have heaven here.