I've always been told I can't run from my problems
but why can't I drive down the coast,
boardwalking and hanging ten
smiling at hippies dressed in henna
why can't I ascend the mountains
reaching into infinity with palms wide open  
I could hop into Seattle,
feel new rain on my face
kissing strangers reflected in the ***** puddles
or maybe flow with rivers til I found a bear's den
they tell me I can't run
so I won't
I'll spring
leap
slide
crawl
I'll tiptoe over the line

I can't stop thinking

“I need to talk to you.” I hate these words. Because in a nanosecond I felt nervous; uneasiness filled my heart, afraid of what you are going to say & afraid of what will happen next. These words are just like the introduction of all the stories I have read. The stories that will always end up breaking my heart.

“I don’t love you anymore.” There. I know that was the second line you are going to say. I expected that. But I guess even though how much you are prepared for the situation and how much you expect that that may cause your heartbreak, you cannot help not to be hurt so much. I did not know what to feel that time. It was a myriad emotion and inexplicable feelings, tears are falling down my face and at the same time my body suddenly feels weak. And I did not know what to do.

It seems like yesterday since you told me that you will always be here when I needed you and that we are going to see together those places we are never going through. Your lips that tell me you really love me and your eyes that can tell it is true; that you are sincere. It has been just like a storm that came in and you are that storm that suddenly destroys my whole life when you left me.

Now I finally understand why storms are named after people.

i wanted you to love me on purpose.

Once I offered you my heart, knowing it was too bruised, too ugly to meld with your imperfect soul. You looked at it with eyes that spoke of dark horizons less travelled and handed it back with trembling caution, too mindful of the searing pain caused by it's many shards. I loved you then, as I do now, though the mention of such things is forbidden within our tight circle of two. I fear your loss as I fear myself, fully and without caution, though now only your traces remain as friendship flounders upon the utterances of my foolish mouth.