I think of your smile
And I wish I could see it
I think of your laugh
And I wish I could hear it
I think of your lips
And I wish I could kiss them
I think of your hugs
And I wish I could feel them
I think of you
And I miss you

I think of you
And I love you

What can I possibly say
that I havent already
to change things ?
If there is something
I can portray
to alter the outcome
just tell me what it is
and I will speak it
Because as of now
saying everything
and saying nothing
produces the same exact results

I had a bad vision last night.
My buddies & I were out clubbing,
hanging out in the swankiest upscale place,
right next to the dance floor.
They were getting
all the ladies
& I just sat there
alone,
******* down
what was
left of my fruity
designer-drink
& wondering,
"Am I too old for my dreams?!"

If you could see me now,
you'd understand
the power of the mind,
titillating,
my raw imagination,
it's hard
not to spill
amorous ink
with me
feeling,
looking rigid
like this.
So kiss me paper,
loosen me up,
make me rise,
I want to use
big sensuous words
to describe
this heartfelt moment.

You assume that everything I write is about you
So here I wrote one especially for you
You want to find some hint of love for you
Well to tell the truth I still adore you
But I can’t tell you that
Because you broke my heart already
Yeah you messed up my mind
Yeah you left me confused, now I don’t feel fine
And yet you can’t feel that pain
Tell me what did you have to gain

Now I’ve said that I don’t need you
And It’s true (no I don’t need you)
And I know there’s just no future in which you’re mine
And that’s fine

(Chorus)
Cause loving you is destroying me
Yeah it’s hard to know if you’re toying with me
Cause you’ve done it before
Who’s to say you can’t hurt me more
I’d like to say that I don’t love you one bit
But I just can’t say it

Yeah now my minds just a wreck
You’re a pain in the neck
And yet you don’t know why
Yeah cause you’re still high dry
Yeah and I want to drag you down
And help you drown
Because I’ve been drowning
Ever since you pushed me in

[Chorus]

I try not to write about you these days
But sometimes I do it anyway
But nevertheless you always say
“Hey is that about me”?
And I always say to interpret it your own way
Cause you’re wrong to assume
That every love song is about you
Cause I don’t have any making up to do

[Chorus]

I find it hard to trust others
And you knew that
And that’s the thing I’ll never understand

Yet you ask why I still talk to you
I thought you would know
I’m too nice to just abandon you

Cause I’ve loved you and it destroyed me
Was I really nothing more than a boy to you
Well I’ve been here before
And the pain, well there’s more now
I’d like to say that I could still love you
But I know how that ends…

You tell me to sit down
But I'm gonna stand right up
I don't want to hide what I'm all about
I gotta let the words flow out
No I don't care what they say about me
This is who I am, now can you see

Maybe I'm not good enough
Maybe sometimes life's just tough
Maybe I don't have anyone to care about
Maybe that's because I can trust no one

You had such a warm touch
I don't understand why you hurt me so much
Yeh you unfroze my heart
Just so you could burn it
Just tell me something...
Are you happy now...? Cause maybe I'm not

Maybe I once meant something
Maybe I should just stop thinking
Maybe you should take a bow
Maybe I should give up now

Maybe I want to get my words out there
Cause maybe I want to know someone cares
Cause maybe I want people to know my name
Oh yes I'm talking about fame
Maybe I want to make a scene
Or maybe I don't because being famous is too mainstream

Maybe my words not worth much
Maybe I'm not either
Maybe I should just stop writing
Maybe I'll never achieve anything

But maybe I will, cause I've never loved anything as much as I love...

Maybe I'm not that bad
Maybe people do care
Maybe there are people I can trust
Maybe tears won't make me rust
But I'm not fussed
Cause maybe I care about you all too much
And I know I say it a lot
Because maybe I don't need all this fairytale stuff
Cause maybe you all make me feel ok
And maybe it's because I could never love one person as much as I love all of you...

You want to find my hope
Well you won’t find it here
You want to find my joy
Well it’s been dead for years
You want to find my passion
Well it’s lost it’s glow
You want to find my mind
Well if you do don’t let me know
You want to find my heart
Well look deeper into yours
Cause I don’t work without you
Cause I’m like a puzzle
But I’m missing half my pieces
Cause its like I’m an intricate mechanism
You can’t unlock me
Oh no you can’t cause I’m too (complicated)
You want to find my smile
Well its too far twisted, I’d be surprised if it wasn’t dead
You want to find my spark
Well lets look for yours instead
Cause you’re a fire
You gotta burn
How else are you gonna learn
That I’m scattered across the wind
Cause I’m like air
You need me to keep you going, but I don’t need you
But now you need to learn how to burn without (me)
You want to find what I can’t live without
Well I’ll tell you honey it’s definitely not you
But when you want to find me
Well… don’t act like you know me…

I hate how much you need me
And I hate that you can’t admit it
I hate that I can’t trust you
And I hate that you don’t get why
I hate that you hurt me
And I hate that you can’t understand how much
I hate that Iris reminds me of you
And I hate how so much other songs do too
I hate that you’re so easy to fall for
But most of all I hate that I can’t let myself fall for you again.

The thing about me you see
Is I'm afraid to be me
So held down by these chains I wear
Cause I'm afraid to be free

Free your mind
Free yourself
Free your hands
Then free everyone else

The thing about me you see
Is I fall in love to easily
So caught up in a fairytale
Cause I'm afraid of what I won't find

Find your muse
Find your love
Find your friends
Then find ascension above

The thing about me you see
Is I'm blind to my own problems
So afraid to see what's right in front of me
I'm a victim of my mind's judgement

Judge your perfections
Judge your flaws
Judge your reflection
Then judge no one else cause...

The thing about me you see
Is I have troubles accepting the truth
Cause when everything I know is false
I'm afraid I can't trust a word you say

Say what you want
Say what you need
Say anything you want to say
Then say you'll no longer make yourself bleed

The thing about me you see
Is I've forgotten who I am
I'm no longer ok, I don't know how to get away
Cause I've abandoned all my plans

Plan your future
Plan your past
Plan what's next
Then plan what's last

The thing about me you see
Is I don't know what to do
I'm lost inside my sorrow, still hanging on til tomorrow
Cause I'm afraid of what you'll do to my heart if I let myself forgive you

You set me free
You're what I'd always hoped I'd find
You know there's no way I can judge you
Then you know I'd mispronounce every word I'd try to say

The thing about me you see
Is I've given up my plans
Cause they all involved you know who
And that's fine, cause who needs her
When I'm happy being with you...