A hummingbird hovers outside my window
admiring itself in the reflection
I see its colors shine in the morning sun,
almost hypnotizing
Staring, I wonder if it sees me
alone behind dusty mini-blinds,
vertical slices of faux wood
narrowly showing the world beyond
Thin lines of what others see,
blooming flowers and green grass
inviting happiness to wander freely
through cool breezes and sunny days
I should smile at this precious scene,
spring is near in signs and actions
Yet I do not, for I despise spring
It is a symbol of life, new life
Life is the darkest thought of my mind’s shadows
That last sip of cold black coffee
Imitating thoughts and dripping moods
Poetic phrases can’t mask
Pleading images claim all empty fault
As crimson blood runs the gutters
Splashing on concrete cracks twisted about my neck
Laughing from a back seat around the next corner
And still that hummingbird lingers, pointing
Tiny wings move in a rapid dance
It’s red throat casting aspersions in my direction
As I reach for my own neck, it is wet, and I am tired