Thank you for the invite to your table.
I have nothing to offer you.
Therefore I cannot sit down.
I am not of noble blood.
In fact there is very little about me that could be described as noble.

I ask that you tell me what ails you?
Do you need something fixed?
A problem resolved?
A dragon to be slain?
Let me bring you its still beating heart.

My character is appreciative but undeserving.
I am the atrocity by nature.
A scourge upon dreams.
A knight for all the wrong reasons.
Look closely, you'll see my teeth marks on the dragons heart.

I figured it out at a fairly young age, there is nothing I want, only what I need.
But if I could have what I want? Free from the gluttony, the guilt, and the greed?

I want to know what, the where, when, and why.
The who doesn't matter, because everyone dies.

Its my desire to know these things that you don't.
Those things you can't know and probably won't.

Like just what was up with the loneliest whale.
Sung much too loud, no friends by his tale.

I'd like unlimited access to what the Hubble finds.
The **** you keep secret from blowing our minds.

To know what she's thinking, feeling, and ****.
So that I may know whether to stay or quit.

To be right on time for all the best sunsets.
Or to forgvie and forget all those ****** regrets.

To know when and where to see the northern lights.
A front seat next time the Komodo dragons fight.

To know if she's smiling, make the why optional.
To know if she's hurt, this ones unconditional.

And why was I where I shouldn't have been when?
And why the hell cant I go back there again?

How may I acquire a bioluminescent glow?
That one right there would be impressive to know.

Just how did I get her to despise me so much?
Was it the lack of presence, or the last time we touched?

What was the name of her favorite song?
I will learn this if it takes all night long.

There used to be this hill upon which I would sit.
I'd watch the stars every night I could as they waltzed across the sky.
I watched Apollo mount his chariot and Ra he did the same.
My favorite nights were when the gods would battle with swords of fire off in the distance.

I thought about that night the night wept.
She was alone, as if it had just occurred to her.
She didn't look at me when I sat on the bed next to her.
She embraced me and cried. It wasn't the "I just found out Tiffany bought the same shoes I did" cry.
It was her heart. The pain was too much to bear.

Forever upon this hill were my four horsemen.
Pestilence, Famine, Disease, and Death.
Steadfast in awaiting my orders they heed in limbo.
And when the day comes when I've had enough.
(ok so the horsemen were just four trees in close proximity but it's my ****** hill so they're horsemen)

I used to imagine being able to walk on the clouds.
Not those whispy ones. Obviously not structurally sound.
No, those big puffy ones. Climbing over them as if they were albino boulders.
Taking ***** on my enemies. Because so would you.

I fell in love three times on this very hill.
And as many times as I paced that ****** hill.
Wouldn't you know it? There was never any love to be found.
In all fairness though. I'm not smart enough to recognize it either.

I never liked the wind upon my hill so high.
Oh sure, every time it got windy the blades of grass would break out into this impromptu synchronized dance montage.
It just had a way of distracting me from my thoughts.

I still think about this hill. It sits on high upon a sill.
It's there this hill must stay. Upon this sill so far away.
I go there in my mind you see. To bury my thoughts or set them free.
I'm taking you there one day too soon.
Don't make plans that afternoon.

I wrote those lines up on that hill. Words like that don't rhyme at will.
**** it and **** I am getting off topic!
This is worse than when I wrote that biopic.
Focus kid, I know you're high. Just make it look pretty and say your goodbye.

My lushly green haired knuckle cocked up from the ground.
It's where you find me should you need me. But that's it. You'll never need me.
Don't worry about it. Because she's up here with me.
And there are no questions. Just laughter.

It'll never matter how I say it.
Or write it.
I could dress it up with lights and display it.
It still won't matter.

I could slay a thousand dragons and tell you jokes along the way.
Though your still hanging on the words someone else said yesterday.

I want to have your drink ready for you when you walk into the door.
To hear about your day and how it went down at the store.

I've cursed the moon so many times because it holds a thought of you.
And any love you deserve is probably years over due.

I am the ogre holding up the bridge if ever you should cross.
Time not spent within your eyes could be my only loss.

A million sunsets and all the stars could never hold a candle.
In trying to relate your attributes I'll probably never get a handle.

Think of me a fool if you will, for this I cannot change.
But should I choose your life or mine, I'll step into the range.

The softness of your presence and the warmth of your smile.
Is enough to hold me over for at least a little while.

Suffer the fools, the misogynist, and the others if you must.
Rest assured my wayward friend in me your heart can trust.

You silly fat ******* these things you don't see.
Your political rhetoric ****** sickens me.

I tire of the lies the half truths and the like.
I'd be pleased to place your head on a spike.

As a warning to anyone who would bring forth hate.
Every four years this **** won't abate.

May I suggest we try something new.
You all go away and come back with a clue.

As to what we can do to make things change.
What sort of policies and laws to arrange?

I may have written down a suggestion or two.
I'll go and retrieve them if you'll just give me a few.

Here's one I wrote while I was high one night.
Free Doritos for all an inalienable right.

Ok so maybe that one isn't so suiting.
Give me a minute my system's rebooting.

These beliefs you hold onto, have just got to go.
Too many variables and things we just don't know.

Persecuting someone because of what they believe?
Have an idea instead, then you'll have nothing to grieve.

Try teaching your kids to be not like you.
To be a good person and not as soft as a shoe.

To say what they mean and mean what they say.
Change will be here tomorrow it takes more than a day.

Stop pandering to the big corporate *******.
Leeches I say! The lot of them! Suckers!

Pharmaceutical companies? They profit from pain!
What you're paying to live? It's ******* insane.

We're brought up to think more money less time?
To ponder or question is considered a crime?

**** that, **** him, and **** her too!
It's time for change, we should try something new.

Worst case scenario? I'm entirely wrong.
I know I'm repeating a familiar song.

Let peace rule out and let's all get laid.
To hell with whitey! Let us all get paid.

Look I'm not really here to bring you peace.
I don't really care about you or your niece.

But you're asking me questions pertaining to matters.
My mind starts a ticking and synapses scatter.

So I give you my thoughts and feelings on ****.
I just found my bowl, it's time for a hit.

So take it or leave it I don't really care.
You don't like my answers? So go over there.

I won't lie and say I trust myself because the truth is that I don't.
I will lie and say I'll be there when, but the truth is that I won't.

I don't know what you want from me much less to what extent.
Most days I just push it through when other days I'm spent.

You may or may not have said those things believe them I just can't.
It's hard to pay attention when my mind it starts to rant.

"It's all absurd, listen not, for these words we hear are lies!
She doesn't love you she doesn't mean it, don't look into her eyes!"

Alas though I'll hang my head, to look into my drink.
Thank Buddah it isn't empty, this scotch it helps me think.

The amber cloud of liquid courage I've captured in this glass.
Brings to mind I'm out of smokes and these thoughts can kiss my ***.

**** the truth there's nothing there but misery and pain.
To soak a soul in smoke and scotch lest he go insane?

The illusion that I'm living I think will suit me fine.
I don't know how the story ends so I refuse to wait in line.

No materials that I want so much that I'll sacrifice my time.
When I could be here hoping you are reading every rhyme.

Well I've sorted all my quandaries relating to this matter.
Whether or not they give a **** could only serve to flatter.

To know the truth will woo the ego or feed my self loathing.
Another lie to tell thyself a wolf in some sheeps clothing.

I thank you though for hanging out as I wrestle with myself.
Choosing which illusion to pull down from the shelf.

I don't know how much I was allotted  at birth.
I've squandered most of it. Alone. Like so many others.
Wondering, hoping, wishing, and scared.

Will anyone ever love me? Why doesn't anyone call? If only. I'm going to die alone.

Out loud these thoughts never emerged. Cloaked behind stupid jokes and momentary lapses of reason.

Now that I'm older. Now that I've come to realize these questions, like so many others. May very well go unanswered.

I've resigned the inquisitor and sent the hangman home. Deciding instead to list these thoughts as beautiful mysteries.

Cigarettes, ***, and whiskey cloud my mind just enough. To keep the book closed. The book will always be there. I know it by heart. Though I'm tired of reading it, hoping to find something I may have missed.

Of all the chapters in that book. My favorites are the ones of you. I never finish these chapters, because I know how they end.

So wherein do they lie, those things too often unsaid?
Have they yet come true?
Or should they be left for dead?

Time will stumble by and death may come to call.
Don't invite him in.
Just let him wait out in the hall.

Back to those things that were always on your mind.
Bearing little fruit.
These thoughts when left behind.

I just don't see the reasoning for harboring such thoughts.
Tying up my dendrites.
Twisting them in knots.

I beg of you to speak your mind I see the beauty there.
Apathy be ******.
I for one do care.

There wasn't a method only a madness.
There was no serenity.
Only a sadness.

The stars will shine and the skies will cry.
Neither one cares for,
you or I.

The oceans will foam on the mouth of the wind.
While it whispers your name,
Now and again.

As supernovas go you were by far the brightest.
You needn't worry about that girl.
Not in the slightest.

This song isn't over and with you I'm not done.
For you are my moon.
And I was your sun.

The fireflies dance to your every whim.
Though unlike you.
They sometimes go dim.

This isn't goodnight and it isn't farewell.
Say it again.
Jamison Bell.

I'd toss you down then roll you over and give you a slap on the ***.
I'd tell you I love you then then slap it again and call you a ***** of a lass.

You'd grin a little then slap my face the moment it was least expected.
I'd tie you down and grab a pillow to do what you least suspected.

I'd take a nap after eating some onions then give you the stinkiest kiss.
I might even blind you then run up behind you and hope I didn't miss.

Like bears in the woods we'll grunt and we'll hollar trust me it'll be good.
Come round two you can be Marion and I'll be Robin Hood.

When it's all done the sweat is drying and I've forgotten your name.
We can meet up tomorrow here and again this time we'll play your game.

The hate that I carry for certain things is somewhat irrational.
Like local news, national news, **** I just hate them all.

Corn on the cob, a ****** slob, neither of these are appealing.
Al ****** Roker a **** hand in poker or the noise of tires squealing.

Exhausted cliches' the word cliche and **** you Betty White.
She's not that funny, she's not even clever, to tv she's but a slight.

If you tell me your christian I won't even listen to what you have to say.
I could bid you ado or say *******, each and every day.

Don't get me wrong I know of my hate, I said it doesn't make sense.
Capitalism ***** poodles are ugly and voting just makes me tense.

Now tell me how I've killed your vibe you karma believing ****.
It doesn't exist no need to persist, your insistence will get you naught.

Very old knots, those ****** themed slots, and even the unicorn.
I'd strap his *** to a watering board and saw off that ****** horn.

You want something pretty? A little less ******? Than all my putrid hate.
I'm good at this game and I know that it's lame and by now it's getting late.

For now I must leave you I probably won't grieve you and I won't say that I'm sorry.
I needed to write I do it in spite of the fact I have no talent.

"I could write you a poem", I said,
hoping against all hope.
"And what would I do with that?"
she reached for a cigarette.

"Perhaps it would make you happy?"
"Is that what you want?" she said.
"To see me happy?"
"Moreso than to see the morrow." I pleaded.

"What about what I want?"
The ember glowed highlighting her cheeks.
"Name it." my hand reaching for hers uneasily.
"I want you........(she smiled to herself) to go away."

It has been many a night,
many a dream has come to pass.
Her skin a reflection of the sun
as it brushes amber stained glass.

The softness of her lips,
petals of the sweetest flower.
The aching of these memories
ceaseless every hour.

The temper of a hurricane
meeting a tornado in a bar.
The passion of a new moon
even with its celestial scars.

Time has made her a spectre
it is my dreams she haunts.
I left without an argument
I gave her what she wants.

Cursed am I to exile
to ponder what she is.
A beauty yet unrivaled,
what was and never is.

This ebony sky, is Nut so sad?
Angry at Ra perhaps.
Bidding him to Duat.
To suffer the whims of Apophis

What hymn soothes her.
Wherein she would bade him to return.
Tis it the song of the seas?
Shall we call upon the cerulean?

Hathor pays me no mind.
She suffers not my woes.
She is love made flesh.
Maybe I am lost to her.

Cursed this binding darkness.

Bast, what does your third eye see?
Is Duat so chaotic?
Your children long for Ras embrace.
Geb longs to awaken.

My cries go unanswered.
Save for Khonsu.
Who dances with Hapi upon the Nile.
I believe it is she.

Khonsu, are you not tired?
Do you not hear the songs of the cerulean?
Cease your daunting ways.
Rest now so that Ra may run his course.

Mafdet, God of justice!
Your scales lack balance!
Suffer Khonsu no more.
Set right this celestial nonsense.

Just as the cerulean began to grow hoarse. Just as the children of Bast were about to begin their exodus. And before Geb set to ease with frost his own labors. Apophis swung open the gates to heaven. Hapi, the God of the Nile lit up as gold to guide Ra out of Duat.
The earth warmed once again. Set ablaze with life unforgiving relishing it's mockery of Seth. Anubis, lowered his head and sat on the banks. Resolved to let Geb have this moment.
Hathor still ignores my plight. But at least now I can see her.

I've seen you.
One time you were seated on a bus. In the back to be more precise. You had your headphones on and you were reading. You were a little nervous. Maybe it was your first time on public transportation. Maybe it was your destination.
You had long black hair. It looked to me like black water, flowing out of the top of your head and tracing its way down to your shoulders. You'd smile occasionally and I'd hope that it wasn't something you were reading. I imagined instead you were thinking of someone. Because it appeared to be one of those smiles that occurs when someone fondly remembers something.
We both got off at the same stop and you asked me where Elm street was. The warmth you exuded at that moment set me at ease. I told you and you thanked me. I watched you walk away. I wanted to follow you. For my own selfish reason. So that I could go on about my day knowing you were ok.
I still think about you.

You on the other hand. You were my only friend in a strange place. I don't know why. I don't know how. We just paired up for reasons mysterious in nature. You were stunningly beautiful. If I had to describe you in the most apt manner I could. Unrealistically beautiful. But there you were.
We walked for hours. We discussed philosophy, relationships, people, love, and candles. There were just so many candles. You told me of your dream to race the Iditarod because it would be something no one would expect of you.
When we at last arrived at the end of our journey, you kissed me. Then you said "thank you for being here" and you left. Like a **** in the wind you stunk up my dreary ****** life with your beauty, sense of humor, and kindness but for a moment in time.
I've never forgotten you either.

Then there was you.
Everytime I see you my heart breaks because it knows it'll have to say goodbye to you. I've cursed the day I met you a thousand times everyday since. It seems only Anubis carries the balm that could sooth my heart.
Your laughter is my favorite song. You're artistic in motion and a melody by nature. In just knowing you, one is happy. because in knowing you one can imagine a world brighter. Void of darkness wherein hope springs eternal.
And though to you I am but another page. Full of words with no stock value. Looked upon only to feed a gluttonous urge.

Because I don't have anyone to listen and I just need to vent.

My heart hurts sometimes.
It's unable to pump at full capacity so it gets tired. My breathing becomes labored. So I go somewhere to be alone. I tell myself I'm going to be ok over and over again.
The pain I'm sure is minimal compared to a lot of other people. I think about them. All of them. And it pangs me to think of their suffering. Because I know they have people that care about them. So I keep telling myself to snap out of it.
It still hurts though. I know one of these breaths will be my last. I know that's true for everyone. I just wish mine didn't hurt so much.
I just wanted to write this out. To pretend for a moment someone was listening.

When you come to the realization.
What an awful destination.
Most of us wish we'd never arrived.
An awakening.
A moment where you realize that you never really mattered.
That that person never thought of you as anything other than just "somebody".
When all you ever wanted was to be someone.
The angst sets in. Consuming you.
All the words meant nothing to them. Those things that took all the courage you had to say out loud. Were of little to no value to them.
Juxtaposed to a feeling of hopelessness.

I don't blame you.
I'm not sure I believe in blame.
Do you remember?
No. I've done my best to forget. And I might say I've done so wisely.
Why?
It's not worth it. There's no gain to be had.
What if there was?
Gain?
Yes.
Such as? Nye, don't bother. As I've said.
What if what was could be again?
It can't. Because it never was. I looked into her eyes.
And?
I saw the world unanswered, I saw the same stars I saw the first time I looked up.
So?
I didn't see me.

I am neither despondent or a respondent of I.
I just accept what it is with a soulful sigh.

From the halls of my mind I relish to find a plight more sorrowful than this.
A missed opportunity a forgotten gratuity or a misery that began with a kiss.

To open my eyes and still see the same lies that still permeate my way of life.
All the forsaken and who are mistaken and some who just live for the strife.

So much turmoil still setting matters to boil and where were you when I looked around?
I screamed and I shouted I stomped and I pouted, and never did I hear your sound.

I have arced my neck to gaze up at the wreck the celestial gods have created.
Touch them I can't so it is that I shan't and so again my dreams are abated.

I hope when I die not that you'll cry but that I may then return to the light.
Not because I belong but to hear that song that'll bring that moment back into sight.

I want to keep my eyes open I know I will cope when I see something I've hoped would be true.
Under an undying tree the sight of me sitting across from you.

Nullifying objectivity I've chosen to stew and rot.
They'll tell me to appreciate the many things I've already got.

I beg of you you hapless fool spare me your advice.
I haven't the time to pardon you, much less play it nice.

My heart is tired this game is old just give me what I need.
My questions many my answers few, at no time will I heed.

Tell me sir is it so, the great Pan, is he dead?
How about poor Tantalus, has he yet been fed?

Answer me you witless *****, have you lost your tongue?
So help the gods of Jupiter, your neck I'll have rung!

Was cold fusion a reality? And are we all alone?
Can you explain the Tao Hum? The origin of that tone.

How about Alexandria? To what means did it fall?
Why are all those Easter statues so very ****** tall?

I'm done with you now David, if that's even your real name.
The doctors tell me you're a statue but I like you just the same.

Here they come with my shot it's you they should meet.
Mikey shorted you on your **** but gave you Hobbit feet.

I may have forgotten that thing you said, I was probably thinking of bacon.
Yes my dear I love you my dear your words are never forsaken.

It's just that you see, bacon to me is not unlike the forbidden fruit.
There's no need to argue, it's plain to see this topic is clearly not moot.

Let me assure you as I remind you of that night I saw you first.
I came to the bar and saw you there and then I lost my thirst.

I drank of your smile and I could see where your rivers ran so deep.
A soul well scorn and nerves well worn by nights bearing no sleep.

We talked for a bit you gave me your time and poured many a drink.
So rare I had pondered when was it last that anyone made me think.

So now you see and cannot moot for somethings I do remember.
From the Chinese food to CVS and that one time in December.

There was a time, she said to me not so long ago.
It made me think about the things I don't already know.

I don't know if she loved me, her feelings were unclear.
I can tell you how my hands would shake whenever she came near.

I don't know where the light is, I can't seem to find the switch.
I can tell what the dark is like, she's a vacuous soulless *****.

I don't know how to "love" myself, I can be quite the ****.
My apathetic nihilism is enough to make me sick.

I don't quite get consumerism, is this something I should know?
Buying **** that I don't need just to help the market flow?

I once claimed to play piano, the fact is that I don't.
I could say that I want to, the fact is that I won't.

So many things left unmentioned, these things I don't know.
Like lightening bugs and that crazy bioluminescent glow.

There is something that should be said before I have to leave.
About a certain someone I keep tucked up in my sleeve.

She calls me out and lays me down stealing every breath.
A demeanor so befitting it would puzzle even Death.

Of all the things that I know so very little of.
She would be the only one that I could say I loved.

I tire of the same old.
Stories long forgotten.
Restless staring at the moon.
My will is broke and rotten.

I heard you once tell a friend.
Of how you long to be.
A necessity to someone.
Just as someone isn't me.

I've never been a destination.
Or a thought one would cherish.
I suppose to most I simply am.
One they wish would perish.

So as I said I grow weary.
Of these waxing gibbons.
Weighing on my soul.
These chains are but ribbons.

My words mean so little.
In so I don't mean much.
Holding on to memories.
Of when I felt her touch.

The names I have acquired from those I hold most dear.
Some are quite obscure, while some are crystal clear.

A ****, a liar, and a  hypocrite just to name a few.
I suppose I'm not so good at picking up the que.

I once wandered to a field where I thought I would find peace.
Where the voices that weigh so heavily would finally come to cease.

I stood out there all alone and while the sun massaged my back.
It was then and there I guess, where I first saw the crack.

My illusions I guess they suffered too underneath the strain.
Unable to bear the weight of going against the grain.

Regrettably I stepped up and put my eye up to the crack.
What lies beyond my illusions? In what there do I lack?

A fallacy in my logic weeping there upon a ledge.
Inching closer to the fall, toes curled over the edge.

I said nothing just braced myself for I knew it had to be.
Another point of reference in what I was to see.

This fallacy is that I am of someone worth a thought.
That you would stop and think of me, an idea I had bought.

When in fact there it stood, the truth that caused the break.
Shining through the illusion, like the sun upon a lake.

Now you would think I'd spackle this and simply walk away.
But if I'm to be reminded I must leave it for today.

To come back to this illusion and be reminded of the truth.
That my presence matters not, is no mystery for a sleuth.

Today I had many plans, all of them fell through.
From going to a party to hanging out with you.

I suppose I'll go back to that field and gaze into the sun.
Where the silence follows me and the imagination runs.

Today or tomorrow.
I'll never be able to tell you.
To be reached out for.
To see a hand appear out of thin air.
Seeking only my hand.
I've seen it happen in movies.
Where she looks at him.
And it's only him she wants to see in that moment.
That must be an amazing feeling.

To be written about in prose.
To be an infection on someone's mind.
So much so that they need a release.
So they write, or they call just to hear their voice.

Something else to be imagined.
Like flight. Escaping.
In one life maybe.

I want to write you a poem concerning how I feel.
It has to come across as meaningful and real.

So I wrote a little bit about my gratitude for plumbing.
Praising pipes and faucets just sets my fingers strumming.

Then I thought this wasn't good and to this make amends.
So I started out on lust, counting down my favorite sins.

What am I? A charlitain? A purveyor of filth and ****.
Someone who speaks of things he wants to stick up in your ****?

No my dear tis not the case at least not this time around.
I'd rather set your mind to ease not run your ship aground.

So let's start by whispering something soft meant to ease.
You can use my sleeve to wipe your nose should you ever sneeze.

Wasn't that not good enough? A little gross for your taste?
Let try to redeem myself I promise I'll make haste.

She approaches draped in honey surrounded by an amber glow.
Knowing things I can assure, you may not want to know.

Like the sun was to Icarus it is her smile that melts my heart.
Without her works to inspire I wouldn't know where to start.

So it's her you have to blame if it's this line you do not like.
I gotta warn ya, if she likes, I'll put your head upon a spike.

Lips like fire smoldering under eyes an emerald green.
Yes I know I got it wrong Todd my eyes aren't so keen.

I'd like to say in closing a great many things.
To spout a song so beautiful like the first few days of spring.

But alas I'll fail you and end this ridiculousness.
By saying I adore you and I need to take a ****.

So tis here I leave you but never for much too long.
I'll cross your mind again one day when you hear my favorite song.

This world is dark wherein I roam,
often voiceless and all alone.
These things you think I cannot hear,
rest assured they're perfectly clear.

You see my friend there's something amiss,
and it's not unlike that very first kiss.
The event horizon breached by a meeting,
the most delightful of all the possible greetings.

Drifting and wading amongst so many souls,
aimlessly doubting they share the same goals.
Lamenting their woes and playing the fool,
never keeping in mind the golden rule.

It's in your nature to feel somewhat needed,
to serve a purpose many have pleaded.
To know that your death might bring them sorrow,
to know that sadness would visit their morrow.

Still though you stand there out in the rain,
thinking no others could know your pain.
Feeling alone and misunderstood,
I cannot help you I wish I could.

It is our tasks to wander this earth,
hoping and praying that time will give birth.
To a realization or an epiphany,
of knowing you are more than what you see.

The journey can **** and be rather daunting,
the spectre of loneliness forever haunting.
Fret not my friend upon looking you'll see,
there's to be no sorrow your will is free.

To love who you want with reckless abandon,
you may happen upon the right companion.
Someone who carest to ask about you,
to know of your fears or the size of your shoe.

Moments show up like scenes in a play,
some last for a while and some just a day.
Hold tight these firsts they may be your last,
before you join me as another outcast.

I can't tell you which star is which.
Only because I don't know.
I can tell you how it feels. To touch one.
It's soft and warm. Think early spring.
That tingling feeling. Couple that with the good kind of nervous.
Never will my heart beat so fast whilst I remain perfectly at ease.
I don't care what we talk about. Just so long as we keep talking.
The mythology behind the blood orchids or Marie Curie.
If I fall asleep, I'll just pick up where we left off in my dreams.
I don't know where that river goes.
I know I can relate to it.
In so as it passes you by in this moment in time, as do I.
Though our time seems of length. Tis only a breath.
I am not yours and you are not mine.
Just as the moon doesn't belong to the wolf.
Nor does the wolf belong to the moon.
In knowing this. I will trade a thousand breaths to one.
If only that one could be spent with you.

So where were you when the light shone through and the curtains went up in flames?
I was down by the river sifting for hope while watching the wolves play games.
So where am I now and what is to be of what was and can I ask why the **** not?
These questions you ask in folds too many are you hinting you think it's a plot?

Question not my questions fool who's forsaken to the winds of fortune and luck.
I'll answer your questions you conceited *** if not for words of which I'm stuck.
Please take this pipe and riddle me this old man will not my spirit be spared.
No it will not, you'll take what is given and what you seek cannot be shared.

Then he hopped away this talking roo, with the blue velvet three shaded collar.
As I sat grounded somewhat dumbfounded I'm looking at all this squalor.
Could this be the reason for her act of treason to what I had hoped we shared.
Could I have been wrong, to sing her that song her ears I thought not to spare.

Tell me Santa who drinks my last Fanta and you know how much I like grape.
Yes I took shrooms, I've trashed many rooms, so my dreams have already escaped?
I need more of that whiskey, just so I don't miss me when I'm sure to misplace my mind.
I know you don't know me and I doubt you will find me when your time turns in kind.

You may taste the acid the surge and the rush as the smoke dances over your head.
It's a ****** up road and a darkly path where better men have wound up dead.
Heed not my warnings my rantings and such for you see I am just too far gone.
Take it from me the guy with one shoe who just woke up out on your lawn.

Of all the things I know not of,
I do not care if there is a heaven above.
A house in the clouds and streets of gold?
Are just some of the frivolities of which I've been told.

I have no need of your petty gods.
I'm betting against them, I like the odds.
I have come to terms when it comes to beliefs.
In that I have none, no gods or chiefs.

I thought that I might've like to go to the show.
To emerge from the shadows and bask in the glow.
It was then that I saw that I wasn't invited.
Upon seeing reviews I was rather delighted.

You say there was dancing and drinks to be had.
That a wise man spoke and said things are so bad.
You gave him your money so he could have more.
He bought a new jet, it's not for the poor?

I think I'm good with this wise man of yours.
He's not feeding the sick and offering cures.
Promises made plenty, never paid in full.
This wise man of yours, sounds more like a fool.

Keep your shamans, your nuns, and your preachers.
I'll take the poets, the lovers, and teachers.
Those people around me who care for my heart.
Those people who nie to tear me apart.

My heart is tired.
I can feel it.
It wants so badly to lie down.
To go to sleep.

I am ready.
I don't want to.
But I must acquiesce.
It hurts, all the time.

Lie to me.
Before I go to sleep.
Tell me those lies.
Before I give Charon his duty.

Tell me you loved me.
Tell me I mattered.
I know you don't mean it.
I just want to hear them once.

I want to believe you.
I can't, though I want to.
As a balm to my heart.
Just say it.

I'm going to lie down.
Call me for dinner.
If I don't rise.
It's my heart. It was just too tired.