Be human
So ******* human
We ain't perfect
I know I'm not
Always human
With our mistakes
And griefs
And happiness
What makes us human?
Try not taking a ****
Everyone does
So don't pretend you're any better
Than any one of us
Try holding in a ****
It hurts, doesn't it?
But then alone you let it loose
And it stinks
Doesn't it?
What makes you think
You can get by lying,
Pretending you don't pick your nose?
A lot of snot, right?
And then you wipe it on your bed
And guys
Quit saying you don't *******
Every guy does
And women
Quit saying you don't play with it
It feels good, doesn't it?
I know I like to
Watching ******* girl ****
And then smoking a cigarette afterwards
**** naked
If we aren't human about it all
Then what the **** are we
A bunch of robots
I don't know about you
But I always want to be human
Make mistakes
And learn from them
If not
Then I'm just ******* doomed
To repeat them
Let's all band together
And say no more!
No more lying!
No more pretending!
Quit using others!
Be yourselves!
Be ******* human

Meaning,
Got to have meaning.
Heart,
Got to be able to express it.

Express what?

There are a lot of words-
Floating around,
Ways to send a society-
To their knees in a frenzy.

Then the words meet people's hearts,
Touching an aspect of their life they can relate to.
Then the words touch their inner soul,
Speaking from another dimension.

Is it all one in the the same,
Whatever one holds dear is right?
It's vast without understanding,
Then minimal with contempt.

Wanting to be set on a pedestal,
But the words aren't even visible.
It isn't clear how much effort it takes,
Nor does it bask in being thought provoking.

Can you have an awe moment,
Reading words that insight?
Sure you can.
Then read what inspires.
Write what feels good.

Take a moment of reflection
And see the beauty in meaning.

The darkness has it's grips on me
Trying to suffocate the life out of me
It's a slow and painful existence
I want to run and hide out
Keep the darkness at Bay
But no good has come from that
The darkness becomes that much more angrier
And tortures me that much more
I stand up and brush off the dirt
Put one foot in front of the other
And look the darkness in it's nothingness eyes
And find some hope in life, it's everywhere
If I will only look instead of wallowing
It's out there, I have been involved in it
I'm just too ignorant to realize the beauty
A talk, well nowadays, a text back and forth
From a family member helps a lot or a friend
Listening to my kind of music helps a lot
Watching my kind of shows helps a lot
Especially ones I just started watching and
Have been out for a while and I think the
Series is over with but I'm just getting into
Staring outside up at the blue sky and
Realizing spring is right around the corner
Washing clothes and being thankful that
Even know I don't have many I still have
Some and that's more than I can about others
But I did there for a period just had the
Clothes on my back and I should of been
Thankful for that but being in self-pity *****
Having a bed to sleep on is a bright spot
Having a roof over my head to sleep on
That bed is a beautiful thing. The
Darkness can try all it wishes to ***** the
Beauty out of my life but it just never will
Because feelings are always going to be
There, that's just part of life, and when
The haze clears from my head the beauty
Is there and I'm thankful for that. Whether
In self-pity or wallowing in thinking God
Or the Universe is out to get me, the beauty
Is always going to be there, I just have to
Open my eyes some and see it all around
And everywhere.

Down on myself
I need an uplift
Something to make me smile
Something to make me feel good

I've been going through a depression
Not eating anything
Everything looks bleaks
The sky is hazy
And I've been feeling weak

Is there anything to save me
Come on, just one ******* thing
I can't live like this another day
I'm going straight out of my mind
Nothing seem right anymore
And I'm curling up in a ball once again

I have a choice in the matter
I can be as glum as I want to be
Or I can look at the positive things in my life
They're out there
I have hope
Haven't lost that

I wake up and there is sunshine
I take a breath and air seeps through my lungs
I stand up to make a *** of coffee
realizing I have a roof over my head
And I'm able to walk
Make that coffee
Have coffee

I step outside and feel the warmth
I see the sunshine
And hear the birds chirping
I can hear
I can see
And things don't look half bad

I see the cars passing by
The hustle and bustle of everyday life
People walking their dogs
Or just walking
I see the day turn into night
The stars are a blanket in the sky
I hear dogs barking in the distance
I see a shooting star
I make a wish
Realizing things aren't half bad

I want to do my own thing
Be free with how I feel
And write words that flow
Getting into people's heads
Through ******* experience I jot
Down on paper how things are
I am a ******* bumb
I live in a trailer with my girlfriend
And child
I get social security as an income
On welfare too
What the **** is life all about?
I try really hard to succeed
But the ******* world weighs on me
I wish things weren't the way they are
But the more I wish the more I get ******
And I want to ******* shout out to the sky
I work hard to raise my kid
Play with her everyday
And love her in every way
I try to work on my relationships
But I can feel it slipping away
Cause I'm rotten through and through
Even though I have ***** by my side
I still look at **** and rub one off
So does that make me evil?
I really ******* don't know
I know love is hard to make it grow
To let it progress into something beautiful
I really am a hard *** criminal
So selfish in the ways I do things
Stealing time like there wasn't enough of it
Stealing my girlfriend's heart
And not caring how I treat her
What the **** is wrong with me?
Too stupid to see
That there is more to life than being a brat
A ******* grown *** man acting like a seventeen year old
And that's that

I feel so much better
Since I surrendered the hurt
The guilt , shame, and remorse
Are only a dream now
My life is going somewhere
Don't know where
But it's going to be good
Way better than the life before
I ended up hurting others
By the way I acted
So much I said and did
To cause others so much grief
I was out to decieve
Honesty wasn't part of my make-up
Lies I told to others
Made it hard for them to trust
They knew what I was about
Trying to pull a fast one on them
Just to get by
Now it's different this time
My actions need to prove that
I don't need to be at the bottom
God has better plans for me today
Or I wouldn't be here
Now I need to stand up
And show my intentions are right
Instead of always making a fool of myself

I hear your pain
Oh, how sad it is
I wish I can do something
But I am so far away
I want to hold you
Tell you it will be okay
But my hug is only imaginable
And the words are through texting
Are we ever going to meet?
I wish it to come true
These days not seeing you
Are by far the hardest
You tell me you love me
And it's hard to believe
How can a love like that
Be defined through messaging
Without us being together?
I can't come to terms with it
I wish I could
But I'll let it go at that
And hopefully the love you
Feel for me will find
It's way to my door

This happened to catch my eye
The truth behind all of the lies
I looked for the honesty
And I just came up empty
It was I who was full of mistrust
I couldn't understand why
The anger exploded within
I couldn't even try
No effort
No motivation
Life was one big mistake
I set the ball rolling
Fear was all I felt
Pushing goodness away
I wanted to experience the pain
And that's exactly what I  ******* got
Turning heads
Making others cry
And I wanted to cry too
I couldn't see the way
It was blind to me
Why was I so inconsiderate
It wasn't my intention
But it was still there
No apologizing
Just a ******* disaster
Waiting to happen
And so it was...

Why is the world so ****** up?
Am I adding to the **** up ness
Or am I contributing something
The sad truth is I'm adding chaos
There is no peace in me
Turmoil and despair is all I see
I think positive
Only to have it come crashing down
I've spent my whole life taking from the Universe
It's no wonder why things are the way they are
Karma has a huge role in it
Cause all I think about is me me me
And not focus on the other person
I am sometimes interested
But for the most part it's about me
So sad that I can be that way
How do I possibly change
When all I've ever been is extremely selfish?
I want to give back to society
Everyone has put up with me for far too long
I feel it's my duty to show my gratitude
For I am still breathing fresh air
And not locked up
Or in a mental institution
Going beserk
And the final outcome
Dead

Love,
It's sometimes blind.
Where can I find it though,
That it won't hurt?
I've been searching for it,
But have come up empty.
I've found out it hurts more than anything else
But is it better to love,
Than never to have felt it?
I've been defeated,
And now I'm left crying.
Love lost,
Love gone astray.
Is there ever a love that will make me happy one day?

*******, what am I all about?
I guess I stand for not much of anything
Is that okay? I guess I'll jack- off
Listen to your ******* too
What the **** has us intertwined?
Beats the **** out of me
I'll just beat my beat
And then think of someone else
It's so much safer
My **** loves my hand
And my hand loves my ****
It never loved your *****
Only satisfaction
Only gratification
Should I say I'm sorry?
Not by a long shot
I could open my nostrils
And the reek came from beneath
How can I ever continue along
Knowing my word amounts to ****
And I'm too scared to be myself
The lights are over my head
This isn't the end
****, can't you get it?
Find another ****
And leave me be
But too scared to be myself
And tell you all these things
Does that make me a man
Apparently not
Just someone to escape
And leave all this **** behind

So many lies I've told
So many I've heard
I don't know what to believe
Can't rely on myself for the answers
Trying hard to skate by
It hasn't worked out for me yet
Years have gone by
And I end up ******* hurt

It has come to my attention
That no matter what I say and do
No matter what I don't say and do
It will never be good enough for you
So *******!