... and when they find my body still and cold
i hope someone decides cry
but i fear they won't
i fear
they will simply see a man who lost
and perhaps they will wonder
at the peculiarity
of why someone would die
when they gave so much
loved so much
and failed every time
that despite his best
the only marker on his grave reads
"wasted potential"
so no one will grieve when
the back of my head disappears
in a red mist
that matches my love
crashing into the walls others built
one
    two
          three
i dont want to see morning
& every "i love you" was a lie
i cant swallow anymore
oh how many lies i gleefully swallowed
despite knowing
trust was already severed
and a dead end was the
upcoming feature film
of reality
**** it...
im done

This feeling is a starry night behind my eyes
A revival of beauty I chose to forsake
But never left

You are this heart in my chest and I love you
Everything about you is perfect as is
And if you change I will change with you
You never wanted to hear it but you are loved
And prayed over constantly
God will replace every pain with a golden rose
You will find love in this life
For I've always loved you
Even from afar

My greatest friend
My greatest love
Wherever you are
Find your way home

Has my heart adjusted to the dark//
or have I simply fallen apart?

Are you with me still//
or do you fear me?

Does the distance end//
with the silence?

The wolf cries out in hunger//
for when love was young.

The questions fall too short//
to the walls of our forts.

This is embodied agony//
lusts for my love to be given.