i'm in love with the way
we all crowd around each other
in flatteringly-lit places
with four walls
overpriced drinks
and some dark noise
as we keep to ourselves mostly
in groups of one or three

being social

but sometimes
you look into someone's lined eyes accidentally,
strangers,
as if to say 'save me, please. are you it? please be it.'
no one ever is
quite
it

then, we look away intensely at the floor,
or pick up an ash tray that is suddenly so interesting,
or ask to *** a cig
or something stupid.

as the night rolls into itself
and you find yourself alone in your unmade bed
again
to conclude yet another day,
now that you're so tired of
conclusions.

and nothing is quite
it

I would let your fingers
into my shirt
to carve pictures
into my back
with your nails,
and I would guess
your drawings
as a game.
You would always veer
from the mole, but
sometimes you
would accidentally
scratch it;
I would
always apologize.

I’ve never
had a bruise
that lasted
more than the
amount of
time it took
for me to
forget how
it got there

I am the liquor store down a forgotten street                                
          that closed long ago,
the "NO-ADMITTANCE " sign still staring out at you
         through blank, dull windows.

                        I've been vandalized.
         My floor stripped bare, shelves broken, bottles strewn about,
    though I've come to quite like
the new graffiti of my soul.

                  All of this done at the hands of drunkards,
                                those who kissed my lips as they stripped me bare.    

               And now here we are, all forgotten.
                                   Perhaps I can only blame myself.

You remark how freely time drains down the bottle.
I wonder if you are out there now,
         measuring your life in beer cans.
If so, I'm jealous. Not of you,
          But of the beer cans.

Have you ever been as drunk from my kiss
     as I am of yours?
                    I hope so. I hope I am not the only one.

Does the sky open up for you when you look into it?
      Have you gazed upon infinity?
                If you have, let me look into your eyes.

      Briefly.

So I can fall into the Dark Forever of your windows.
    So these walls marked by unkind hands
        might know themselves again.