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 Jun 2017 Hot Ten Nama
JL Smith
I woke before the sun,
But if I'm honest, I never slept
I knew I'd dream those nightmares
Of the secrets that I've kept

So, I confess

I sense when you're behind me
As I turn and lock your stare
Or how my insides go crazy
When your laughter fills the air

I act as if it chills my bones,
But you possess the warmest touch
Others grow weary of discussion
Yet, I crave your words so much

Distance draws an ache
I try to feel you near
The clock becomes my nemesis
Time is closing, I fear

I'd get homesick as a child
Inside different walls I felt alone,
But now it's not a house I miss
It's your heart I've called my home

© JL Smith
there are days when my body feels
emptier, compared with the springtime
drained of motivation, lumbering legs
are harder to move, an unfamiliar feeling

i keep gently kicking some stuff up in my mind
remind myself i'll be happy later
if i'm more productive now
which is true, and i will be.

i used to kiss the nectar from the neck
of the one who gushed for me

until one day i had to accept,
does she still gush for me?

i worry about not being fun enough
to hang out with. i worry about my weak
memory. an awkward personality.
trying too hard. i do,
i worry about these things.

— The End —