Have you ever felt like every bit of you was slowly fading away
one by one your limbs disappear
but its all in your head.
You don't want to be here
and anyone can see the proof on your body
You just want to be forgotten
what's the point of staying here
it just feels like your yelling and scratching at the walls around you
but no one notices

Sometimes I don't want to remember what its like to hold you,
what its like to feel the warmth of your skin against mine,
the sound of your voice or the way you laugh.
I want to forget every time you kissed me,
every time you made me happy and I didn't want you to go
I want to take back the promises, take back the wish I made upon that star.
I don't want to know what its like to have that someone, I want to be alone.
But then I realise thats not what I need.
I need your presence and to see your smile
I need to hold you and know I have you
I need you to see how you make me happy
I need your kisses, and need to hold your hand
I just need you and all of you

I hope that one day
when my bodies numb and my heart stops beating
I finally realise what life could be,
my eyes finally open up to what they should've when I could breathe,
but that day will come soon.
& until then, i'll keep pretending to care about the world
keep fighting for things I want, pushing away things I need
and doing everything thats viewed 'out of line' in this world.
I wont change till Im stopped..

Id love to get away for a while but with this loneliness haunting me,
it would break me down even more just being away from what i already know.. i really want to venture out and explore something new but im too scared that might hurt me too, i want be free from myself, but im tied down i cant move from here,  im such a burden to myself, maybe if i make a change and cut my long hair il be free.. maybe thats whats tying me down?

i dont know how to write poems