Remember the pain?
Remember the sadness?
Remember how
you wanted to die?
You thought you would die.
But something changed.
Someone came
into your life, promised to stay
And healed your heart
He completed the impossible task of healing you
But you were not completely fixed
You were better, but the cracks were still there
And you struggled silently, barely even telling him
You were still in pain, so much pain
But you knew you had to open up and tell him
You told him the truth, everything
You told yourself the truth, too
You couldn’t battle the demons alone
And when it all came down onto your head
You screamed and tried not to cry, you said
“I almost wish I could be dead!”
He was so scared, so scared of those words
You saw the fear glisten in his eyes
But you weren’t there to see him cry
As he made sure you wouldn’t say goodbye
He spoke the words you didn’t have the courage for
And the walls of the dark, cold box you were in
came crashing down around you
The sunlight blinded you, but you felt better
basking in its warmth
The pressure of the secret was gone from your chest
And when you saw him again,
After what he’d done, his fear was clear
Scared because he’d broken your trust
But you broke his, it was only fair
When you’re soul mates, pain is something you share
You promised him you were not mad,
In fact you were honestly quite glad
He saved you for the second time
And you felt an overwhelming gratitude
Because with him you knew there would be no more solitude.

I hate being a damsel in distress,
Lying on the railroad tracks
with a villian laughing behind me
I’ve always fought back
Tie him up instead,
let him squirm in the coral snake pit
I’ve never liked being saved,
Seen as fragile and weak,
Standing here with my pretty dress and rose-petal cheeks
No, I’m not fragile, I’m not weak
I prefer boots over slippers
Trousers over skirts
I’m not some poor, defenseless litte princess
I know how to weild a sword

But then my knight came along,
And while I’d still fight,
There were battles I could not win,
Not without him
And when I collapsed beneath the dragon’s feet,
My knight came
Weilding a sword of tear-stained steel,
The metal reinforced with soul mates’ heartstrings
And he was brave, slaying the dragon
Even as I tried to get back up on my feet and say “Nay!”
The great beast fell, and my knight turned to me
Eyes glimmering with fear
“I know you prefer to defend yourself,
But it looked like you needed me here;
I couldn’t just let him devour you.”
I stepped forward, booted feet suddenly light
And surprised him with a crushing hug.
“Thank you,” I said, “thank you.
I will owe you forever for this, my knight.”
He smiled at me, relief lighting his face, and replied
“All I need in return is you by my side.”
We sealed the promise with a kiss.

But that still doesn’t make me
A damsel in distress.
I’m a knight, too, just like him,
And we save each other.

Sharing words
face-to-face
is a surprisingly powerful act
Once I find my way past the barriers of my own reluctance
I find it's very relieving to speak my mind
And finally confess
that I
am not
okay.

I do not write
from my head
where too many thoughts
tend to foul my words.
I prefer to write
from the heart,
where every line and lyric
rings clearly, true and pure.

D
  r
  i
  p

D
  r
  i
  p

D
  r
  o
  p

This safe little bubble
    is about to
                             P   O   P!

You better watch out,
or the beasties will get you
They’ll dig in their teeth and you’ll
S     C     R     E     A     M

No one, no one, no one can hear you SCREAM!!!!

Isn’t it so sad?
You cry, but no one sees the saltwater sorrow streaking your face
and they just can’t hear the sound of your heart
thudding to a sudden stop
as your body goes numb
Blissful numb, can you stay in the dark?




“No, no, no!”
The voice attacks and digs electric probes into your chest
ZAP!
“Wake up!”
ZAP!!
“Wake up!”
ZAP!!!
“Please, please, please, wake up!”

But I’m in so much pain,
you try to say
Can’t you see this is easier than trying to stay?
Oh, no, I didn’t want to hurt you this way!

Fresh tears f
          a
           l
           l

                       d r i p p i n g   on the floor like the blood just did
Your blood, keeping you warm and alive and feeling and hurting
and you didn’t want to feel anymore
So you forgot that you had a heart and soul
You forgot that you hold so many hearts in your hands
You forgot that someone still cares
You forgot that someone still needs you there
You forgot
how to
breathe.

The machine breathes for you as you open your eyes
The golden sunlight pokes through the blinds
Highlighting the face of the one who holds you dear
Fast asleep, but face still screaming fear
And you realize why you still live:
You still hold someone’s heart in your hands,
and you must never, ever let it fall
and shatter against the cold concrete
Where chalk lines told you where to jump
Where the neighbor’s dog died after you pulled his crushed body out of the road
Where a fresh first kiss shocked your heart, and more followed after
And where you tried not to cry as you said one more goodbye

How long ago was that, that last goodbye?
Hello and goodbye,
you suddenly start to cry
The sunlight lights up the opening eyes
Of the one you hold dear
The one whose heart you still hold
Oh, you’re so glad
to say hello.

“I’m here.”

See the paint
dripping down the wall
Watch it as it falls
to stain us all
Red-streaked fingers
and mercury shining eyes
Eyes staining the sky
Silver and gold
to make new friends
But will you keep the old?
Or just ball them up
anicent poems in a torn-up notebook
toss it onto the pile of wood
Toss the lit match, watch it burn
Gold flames melt the silver down
until it dissolves
and is gone
Blackbird swoops down
and the tip of his wing
whispers to the fire
“Ignite me, I beg you;
your golden flames are just so beautiful.”
The shrill scream of the blackbird
pierces the sky
And makes the clouds cry tears of
clear sorrow and bitter sympathy

Standing below, face tilted up,
a little girl pokes her tongue
through her teeth
She can taste the sorrow and sympathy
And she can taste the fear
She can taste a world of pain
just in one single tear.

I just want to put out a little message for everyone who is struggling right now:
You are not worthless. You're not. Even if people are leaving you and you feel alone, you still have friends and family in your life who would care if you disappeared. You may feel like no one would even blink an eye if you were just gone, but you'd be surprised by how big of an impact it can really make. It's like tossing a pebble into a pond. The ripples spread all the way across the surface.
Don't give up on love. Don't give up on friendship. Don't give up on life. There is always hope if you search for it. There is always someone in your life who holds you close to their heart, even if you don't know it.
Keep living, and don't give up now.