escape: Favorites

On Tuesday,
I drank tea with a skeleton
named Eileen.
Her fingers were long,
and her lips were drawn
like a frown, unable to move.
It was a sad sight to see,
and it convinced me to be happy,
now matter the weather,
and she said --

If I were to die,
which I will, one day,
I would like to pass in a forest,
for surely it is curious
for a life to end
where so many
begin.

So we laid her body in a bed of daisies
and painted her eyelids with raspberry tears
and coated her lips with the Queen's honey
and covered her naked corps with ferns
so that she finally experienced the embrace of a Mother.
Cause she said --

If I were to die,
which I will, one day,
I would like to pass in a forest,
for surely it is curious
for a life to end
where so many
begin.

This is a song I wrote, with a combination of my own original poems combined.
https://soundcloud.com/cadencewhittle/eileen
I wrote these poems separately with a good friend of mine in mind. She was like a sister to me, and ended her own life a few years back. Her home life was awful, and she didn't have a mother, and would always talk about how sad she was that she didn't experience the love of a mother. She suffered from countless mental health issues, and I do believe her soul is at rest now. I hope you enjoy it x

#love #suicide #depression #original #ana #anorexia #song

Apr 2014 escape

You my love.

Apr 2014 escape

Georgia Marginson-Swart

You my love.

You are a blur to me
I cannot remember how many times we have kissed or how often you say my name but I remember the feel of those lips and the way you sound when they are speaking words only for me. I dont know how long I have spent in your arms but I know that hours are not long enough and I know that when you laugh at something I say my heart skips at least three beats. I know that your every movement is vivid and fluorescent to me. I dont know how many times you breathe in a minute but I know that your heart sounds like steady drum and it quickens when I tell you I love you. And I do mon amour, I do.

For my darling boy

#love

Apr 2014 escape

Why? (Song by: Rascal Flatts)

Apr 2014 escape

Erin Hankemeier

Why? (Song by: Rascal Flatts)

You must have been in a place so dark
You couldn't feel the light
Reachin' for you through that stormy cloud
Now here we are
Gathered in our little hometown
This can't be the way you meant to draw a crowd

Oh why, that's what I keep asking
Was there anything I could've
Said or done
Oh, I had no clue you were
Masking
A troubled soul, God only knows
What went wrong and why
You would leave the stage
In the middle of a song

Now in my mind I'll keep you frozen
As a seventeen-year-old
Rounding third to score the
Winning run
You always played with passion
No matter what the game
When you took the stage
You'd shine just like the sun

Oh why, that's what I keep asking
Was there anything I could've
Said or done
Oh, I had no clue you were
Masking
A troubled soul, God only knows
What went wrong and why
You would leave the stage
In the middle of a song

Now the oak trees are swaying
In the early autumn breeze
A golden sun is shining on my face
Through tangled thoughts
I hear a mockingbird sing
This old world really ain't that
Bad of a place

Oh why, there's no comprehending
And who am I to try to
Judge or explain
Oh, but I do have one
Burning question
Who told you life wasn't
Worth the fight
They were wrong, they lied
Now you're gone and we cry
'Cause it's not like you to
Walk away
In the middle of a song

Your beautiful song
Your absolutely beautiful song

"Why?" by Rascal Flatts is about a teenage boy who took his own life. The boy must have been in a dark place with his mind and emotions, but never showed them until it was too late. The man who is singing this repeadedly asks the question "Why?", meaning, *why would you want to take your life so soon?, why didn't you ask for help?, why would you leave the stage in the middle of your beautiful song?*
towards the end, the man says "This old world really ain't that bad of a place", he is absolutely correct. This world isn't bad, at all. Then he asks a question that makes the audience think: "Who told you life wasnt worth the fight? They were wrong, they lied. Now you're gone, and we cry"

I recited this piece for speech competition two years ago and left the entire room in tears. My score did not matter to me, I simply wanted to get the message across. If you are experiencing depression, or any "dark place" PLEASE talk to somebody. I have had my share of dark times, but I promise it can get better in the end. I am more than happy if you would want to talk to me! :) Just message me and we will talk. :)

R.I.P.... T.S. and T.B. <3 See you soon my brothers.

#love #depression #passion #god #death #why #light #darkplace #troubledsoul

Apr 2014 escape

Poem about puking

Apr 2014 escape

michele shulman

Poem about puking

I thought I could purge all the flowers and metaphors trapped inside my rib cage with stems tickling my esophagus.

Blooming on the tip of my tongue, teeth locked them in but finger allowed escape.
Hand prying its way through my mouth, I wished to pull out my intestines and allow the stitches holding me together unravel.

Beauty doesn't thrive in an abandoned building so I let them free, no sense carrying casualties in a house destined to burn.

I remember the first time I prayed to the porcelain throne, begging for salvation.
A feeling manifested in my stomach and infected each vein, it swam through bone marrow leaving behind a trail of decay.
My framework was rotting and mind consumed, knees fell to the ground and I prayed for forgiveness, acceptance and peace.

Every time I vomited I felt one step closer to heaven, as if entrance to the gate had weight restrictions.
You stepped on a scale before they sewed on your wings, for all angels have to be pristine and my soul carried the weight of an eternity of mistakes.

I was a coward hiding behind a romanticized disorder to avoid reality.
The light has grown within, it keeps my food safely in my stomach lining and let's my words out,
A lesson I've been unable to face for years.

I remember the day I was diagnosed with EDNOS.
Eating disorder not otherwise specified.

I wanted to punch the specialist in the face with my emaciated knuckles for degrading the massacre I instilled on my body.
Not bulimia. Not anorexia. Not specified.

She tied me to a label that said the years I dedicated to restrictions and malnutrition and stomach acid dissolving the very foundation of my teeth meant nothing.
**** your dsm 5th edition and the ****** waiting room keurig green tea with low calorie sweetener you provided for each session.

I found a reason to live within myself.

Apr 2014 escape

Desire

Apr 2014 escape

Paige

Desire

Sometimes you
learn the most when
you stop paying attention
and start listening.
My professor said
something in the middle
of her lecture that caught
my attention so much,
I wrote it down.
the cause of all suffering
is desire.
If only I could
stop my heart from
beating, every time
he says my name.