You were my beautiful urgency
Your lips promised the world onto the fragmented map
left in me
A beautiful Pangaea sealed together
The world stopped for us- the naive mapmakers
While everything else spun into beautiful chaos
The madness of the tectonic mountains
stop for none
Not even the innocent promises forged across the continents
They laughed as their rifts
battered our beating hearts,
Until their was nothing left but a single pulse

Memories flood me, brutally constant, like the tides angered at the shore

When your laughter stretched across the ocean
But somehow only seemed to reach me
Pulse
When we picked out the life our children would have,
Like it was some neat and concise future picked from a catalog
Pulse
When our world went up in smoke, it had never been
clearer
Pulse
When our hearts started beating for someone else
Someone else besides for you and me
Pulse
When you walked away
Pulse
And I realized it was too late
Pulse
When I knew in that moment your brokenness would forever
Cut sharply at my heart, etching those four words left unsaid
Until I was as broken as your ghost
Pulse
When
Pulse
I
Pulse
Realized
Pulse
You
Pulse
Were
Pulse
My
Pulse
Everything
Pulse
And I was just your side thing.

Pulse

What can be said about your beautiful urgency when your time has run out?

I fell in love with a composer
He told me middle C was his favorite
It a home
That he could always find
Right in the middle of all the crooked
Black and whiteness

He became the conductor of my life
He used to tell me
“I love you I love you I love you.
Goodnight Goodnight Goodnight.
See you in the morning See you in the morning See you in the morning”
Over and over
Becoming my anthem of lies

I heard that the day she had left him
He forgot to say it once
So maybe I suppose
He thinks that if saying it a single time
Can’t save her ghost
Then maybe saying it to me
100 times can

He tried to take that repeat sign of his love
Unwind it and bind
My heart to his
He couldn’t set me free
Because he knew that if he did
I’d never return
You see I was never his

I was supposed to compose a song
About regret
But baby if you put him and me
Onto that page
You’d have a symphony
Of broken set of my chords
That he couldn’t tune

You think that just because you can use the f-bomb you can cause explosions.