I wish you knew how empty I feel in your arms.

I wish you knew that when I whispered the words "I miss you" I meant you.

I wish you knew what it felt like to turn from fire to ash so quickly.

I wish you knew that you did this to me.

i’ve tried to breathe life into us so many times
you’d think i was playing god himself
i’ve blown all the rust off the curves of my shoulders
i’ve blown all the dust off the books on my shelf

i saw the world in the way you walked
you saw the lipstick on my teeth
you are all things bright and beautiful
and i’m just the current beneath

i will try on everything in my closet
i will shine all of my shoes
i will go to the store and spend 15 bucks more
if i don’t have the right shade of blue

because **** it, i like it when your arm touches mine
so long as i stick to water and avoid any wine
i want you to think, “there she is!  there’s my perfect ten.”
but i’ll be growing out my hair and growing old until then.

you are a man. but i am a ghost of what is in between
the salt of the earth and way of the wind, evident but unseen
you’ve shown me that it’s real, and it’s rocked me to my core
and if you turned off the lights, i could be everything you’re looking for

Please listen.
Listen to me

Even if you say you won't.
Even if you say you can't.

That poison
you direct at yourself
You don't deserve.

Those cuts,
Those scars you think no one sees
Are as bright as the moon on a clear evening.

They show your poison,
They show you screaming,
"I need someone
I need someone
To protect me
From myself
Because I've lost all control."

"I need a wall to lean on.
A shoulder to cry on.
An ear willing to listen."

I will be your ears,
And I will listen
To every single word
You are willing to pour out.

I will be your shoulder to cry on,
Your wall to lean on
when your poison overflows
and makes you weak.

I may not be right next to you
When you are overflowing with poison,
Your demon forming,
But
I will always be with you.
I will always support you.

I will help you let out your demon
That's formed from lies
And I will dispose of the poison
Oozing out of your pores
And rolling off of your tongue.

So please,
Even if you think you're alone
You're not.
I'm here.
I'm listening
And I'll do everything
To rid you
Of the poison flowing through your veins
Injected by others,
And produced by yourself.

Am I the only one
That laughs to hide my sadness?

We're a lot like books, you know?
We have an outside cover people will judge us on,
And we all have quite the story to tell.

I long for those days
When we had something to treasure
Outside the sheets.

When we were in love
When "we are in love",
Were we actually?
Are we now?

Because
Even those kisses
And nights full of *******
Feel unrequited.

I ache
For your love
Not your lust,
which is all I've been seeing.