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Aug 2015 · 888
Red Clay
Emanuel Martinez Aug 2015
I am red clay
I am not lost
Because everywhere, I am
Stretching out to you
To keep me grounded
So I myself won't be eroded
By whitewashing
August 27, 2015
Emanuel Martinez Apr 2015
I am worth being valued for existing
Not only in the moments
That I become relevant, necessary, or useful
For lustful, celebratory or inspirational insanity

I am not a lollipop or an exotic destination
Stop exploring me *******
Because you salivate over this Hispaniola
Beautiful island desecrated and decimated

How many beautiful spirits will you make savages
How many pure rivers will you **** blood on
How many conquests will you claim a stake in
How much balance will you disturb and subjugate
to the trauma of your transitory exploration

There's no impunity for conquerors
Who taste, plunder, disguise disapproval in their apologies and move on

There's no impunity for conquerors
Who pick and choose who's worth
Of validation, when, & how

There's no impunity for conquerors
Who play with men and women
Hierarchize their prey
But fail to acknowledge
Their man-child whitewashed
Hidden agendas & rigged market values

Conquerors haunted by the trauma they've caused
Will not be absolved by the revolution

Neither will the revolution be the breast
That heals conquers who are traumatized
By the realization of their own fuckery
April 22, 2015
Emanuel Martinez Mar 2015
What is it about this chase that eludes me
That runs away from me
That seeks to experience and then flee me
Until I get hijacked by another
Consenting to my own free fall into ignorance and bliss

Conditioning myself to transmit
Abundance without reservation
Until shot at the knee
But dragged along for a while longer
By the chains I so genuinely let bind me

And even before the wounds have healed
I don't stop running, I won't stop running
Resolute in a chase that targets me
I do so unconditionally

But you can't hijack my senses
I am not an experience or experiment worth having
I am not a temporary treat to be improperly digested and defecated
I am not an amber that ignites upon initial contact
To then be mediated or extinguished if the temperate is not right
I am not the holy water that you colonize
And shower with to cleanse you
To then invalidate that sanctity
When it falls down the drain
I am not a barometer that reliefs the labor
Needed to challenge the aberrations
Of your colonized and colonizing tendencies

I exist
Physically insignificant
As the earth that birthed me and will bury me
But eternal in essence
I am a permanent presence
I am an unforgettable imprint
I am your equal, no less, no more

The moment that we mutually acknowledge
Each other's existence
I have bound myself to you
From that moment...loved you unconditionally and eternally
And expect no lesser commitment
From you to me, or any other person you meet

And even after the wounds have healed
I don't stop running, I won't stop running
Resolute in a chase that targets us
We must unleash our abundance unconditionally

And when we leave
We will have given
Absolutely everything
That we had to give
During that time of our existence
March 6, 2015
Emanuel Martinez Jul 2014
I'm a menace, baby, menace
Mess with me I'm a furnace
Come near
Imma put you in flames

I ****, baby, ****
But you still adore me
Rather fill yourself up
Then give me up

You're a zombie
I'm the poison
That's keeping you there

You're lustful for everything in the world
My seeds plant desire in your mind
Keeping you hungry for more

Money, baby, money
Your god, your mandate, your sacred script
July 3, 2014
Mar 2014 · 3.6k
Healthy (As Act of Defiance)
Emanuel Martinez Mar 2014
The revolution will not take place in McDonald’s
Born out of lethargic, flaky or fickle bodies

Words and actions, powerful ammunitions
But vessels, our bodies, control those manifestations
An armament, the body
Matter without which revolution cannot happen

Us who struggle, while we waste away
Those invested in maintaining power and privilege
Don’t only safeguard their money
They protect their bodies too
And only that of the offspring
Invested in perpetuating power and privilege

They not only monopolize learning and leadership
As mechanisms of dominance and control
They run and eat to fuel that constant fight

Man, wealthy or poor
May give into the vise of fast food and intoxication
But those invested in control
Conscious of power and privilege are no fools
Fortified not only by lawyers and henchmen
But by doctors, fitness trainers, fresh harvests
Having the choice and access to fresh produce

Us colored children from the hoods, the barrios
Our moms, or dads, or single parents
Working month to month
Frustrated because we don't eat fruit and vegetables
Instead eating frozen, canned, chemically enhanced
Microwaveable dinners and junk foods

Skinny, chubby, or obese
Eating our twinkies, doritos, and coke
Can’t even run a block without running out of breath
Diabetes, heart disease, cholesterol, asthma, obesity
Not even looming in the back of our minds

We need youth to represent our communities
We need youth to fight for our communities
We need youth whose minds and stomachs are filled
Not with fodder and capitalist waste
But with food, ideas that fill them, fuel them
Not out of a temporary desire for satisfaction
Rather a prolonged political exercise to fortify themselves
As agents of a transformative process in the world

Frozen, canned, chemically enhanced lunches at school
Soda fountains, fried food, fast food, junk food
May always be subsidized, marketed, made affordable
To be part of your breakfast, lunch and or dinner

Still never reject an apple, orange or pear
Those with power and privilege
May not even have to think about
Their regimented diets
With endless fruits available to them

But for us, a single fruit made available to us
Has to be a daily reminder
An act of defiance
To chose to strengthen our bodies with it

A slippage of those invested in our chains
When the owners of industry
Have socialized us to think
Coca cola, pizza, and burgers
Are parts of our cultural identity
A modern industrialized upgrade
Our diet decisions driven by capitalist consumerism

There may be no specialized fitness trainers
Expensive equipment
Lush parks, jogging tracks, bicycle lanes, or bicycles
In our neighborhoods
But there is a space right next to your bed
Or a piece of floor where you live
And you have your body
Just do a few jumping jacks, push ups, sit ups

You need to have the patience and love
To protect and fortify not only your mind
But your body
To know that the more you fortify yourself
The more you are going to be able to fight exploitation
The more you are going to protect and fight
The ones you love, and even the ones
You won’t even realize you have saved as a result

We may not always have the access to healthy food
But we have the choice to request it collectively
In educational spaces and to take the initiative to exercise
March 25, 2014
Emanuel Martinez Jan 2014
My sky's only bright when you shine
Your smile is my vitamin
When you're happy, I'm fine

Today, thought about you again
Spent whole day alone
You were all I could ascertain

Die before causing you pain
My life depends on you
Your peace of mind, I wanna gain

Ain't no trophy, career, or transformation
If it doesn't involve you by my side
Ain't no way else, only you're my revolution

I've got our contract on my heart
Promising you forever and ever
Waiting for you to own this work of art

Let it fill you up, every part
From your head to your toes
Pumping from your heart
Through to the tiniest flows

Breathe in, close your eyes
Hush don't say a word
Feel my love give you butterflies
January 12, 2014
Oct 2013 · 1.2k
Everyone the Best
Emanuel Martinez Oct 2013
No home, no less
No ruse, no truce, no stress
Just kind of mindless

Children playing in the wild west
Ain't no army, no fighting there
Only slides, swing sets, starring our best

No fear, no less
No lies, no cries, no sadness
Just the tireless

Kid president makes his address
Ain't no nations, no half-breeds
Only humans, planet earth
Where everyone the best
September 19, 2013
Emanuel Martinez Aug 2013
Being human can be incredibly painful
But to be human...to truly feel like a realized human being
is to feel powerful...is to feel an out-of-body experience
because we realize that we are beautiful, brilliant...
and deserve to feel what it means to
TO BE FULLY HUMAN and nothing less.

That our dreams, our aspirations, and our capabilities
cannot be restricted by artificially constructed restrictions.
And because of that we cannot allow under any circumstance
for the humanity of anyone to be negated.

That every inhale we take without helping legitimize the humanity of one more,
Is further securing the chaos which threatens our own.

That to love another human being,
no matter how strange or familiar, difficult or easy
Is to really understand the profoundness of our own humanity...
Is to love ourselves.
And because of that we cannot fathom a world
Where anyone is negated the ability to love.

Whereby the consciousness of our fullest potential
Understands no artificial restrictions
Knows no terror, war,or attack that can silence the eternal soul of its truth
And can only conceive of a world where everyone's humanity is legitimized
August 19, 2013
Jul 2013 · 8.9k
Where's My Liberation Gone?
Emanuel Martinez Jul 2013
500 years of conquest
500 years of oppression
500 years of struggle
500 years of resistance

500 years of globalization
500 years of plundering
500 years of capitalism

I am a child, of the children, of the masses
Rising from Latin America
Of the and in alliance with...the oppressed of the world
White brothers and sisters haven't you seen your chains, too?
Because us colored children have long forgotten ours

But I'm tired of the chains...searching...where's my liberation gone?


Afro-Caribbean
Afro-Latino
African American
African
Indigenous
Asian
Middle Eastern
My people of color
Why can't we come together

Because we continue to be lied to
We continue to be denied
We continue to be subjugated
To the fact that we are subordinate
To something that is not us

That we are devoid
That we are empty
That we are workers and masters
With no mind or soul

We are the people without license
No legitimate place, in the periphery
Outside the margins
A threat to the safety of societies

Always the other, never part of we within discourses

We are the black slaves
In your blood and heritage Caribbean children
Your negation of us has been your ploy to secure your servitude to white supremacy in exchange for your economic stability.

We are the indigenous
That harvested and nurtured these beautiful Americas
Pests of conquest, you exploited our black brethren because we were not suitable for your exploitation. Instead you massacred us. Ever since confusing us with your mestizaje fodder.

We are the peasants, the servants, the broken families, the broken communities, the displaced peoples, we are the casualties, we are the unmitigated collateral damage:
Of revolutions, of wars, of conquests, of western civilization, of capitalism, of profit, of misanthropy

We are Trayvon  Martin, we are the 25 million families affected by Texas decision on abortion, we are the masses being left out by the recent reversal of the Voting Rights Act of 1965, we are the LGBT binational couples fighting for our rights, we are the undocumented community in solidarity asking TO BRING THEM HOME, we are the Brazilians demanding to be heard over the government's preoccupation with the preparations for the world cup, we are the everyday poor and homeless

From our peripheral places we are the ones that resist because otherwise we will die.

We are the ones that cannot afford to oppress anyone, because we are the most oppressed
Living in a system that pushes even those who are the most oppressed to mimic the system's usage of oppression
When there's no one else to oppress, still being aware of ourselves, we try

My Latin American brethren don't tell me that Haiti's silenced past does not pertain to you
They fought for the universal rights of everyone, doesn't that include you?
And because of that its revolutionary past has been dismantled within history discourses
So that other colored children of the world like you would not dream to resist their own oppression

My Latin American and Caribbean brethren stop negating your blood, culture, history...Don't you see it has been deliberately silenced so that you cannot understand yourself? Because to understand yourself, is to love yourself, is to realize the potential of you, is to resist anything that doesn't allow you to be you

African, and indigenous historical actors laid down their lives so that you could exist
The puddle that formed out of the rivers of indigenous and black blood is all red. Isn't that enough for you to understand that our oppression is tied, that we must defend each other.

Our tool against oppression is not money or guns.
The greatest fortress of the oppressed is our mind.
History is our weapon.

Our histories are powerful
Granting us consciousness
Giving us bravery
Dispelling lies and shattering the silencing of our power.

Let us nurture our colored children to love their histories
That they may understand the common experience of oppression of the masses the world over
That they will be ready and able and accountable
To the continued act of resistance of the oppression of any human being.

We are the ones that cannot afford to rely on ourselves, we are the vulnerable ones, we are the ones with targets on our backs, we are the ones in constant threat, we are the beautiful middle eastern peoples being targeted as terrorists and extremists, we are the poor with undiagnosed PTSD, we are the undocumented parents and adults with lost dreams, we are the inner city kids who have been lost to drugs, crime, and STDS, we are the ones that let others decide our rights

We are ones that must form alliances with each other, we are the ones that find strength in numbers, we are the ones that need allies in positions of privilege, we are the ones that must create the revolution through the power of our minds, not the wars, tool of the oppressors.

We are the hopes and the dreams that have faded from our parents, and grandparents, we are the revolutions that never came for the slaves, the servants, and the peasants of our heritage

We are the most dangerous obstacle to oppression.
Dormant in us is the promise of the liberation I've lost.
July 27, 2013
Emanuel Martinez Jul 2013
It's the story of us
Shooting stars
Coming in and out

We fight, we yell
We laugh, we tell
Each other, our wonders or miseries

Standing still, time to ****
Deal with what we will
The pain and love that's very real

Time pushing us over the hill
Tik tik tik tok running out
There's no medication, no pill

Better get ready to feel
In harmony or war
Our hearts need a meal

We fight, we yell
We laugh, we tell
Each other, our wonders or miseries
July 27, 2013
Emanuel Martinez Jun 2013
Once I lost you
Once I tossed you
You never said a word
I never could have heard

Miracle you bore
A refugee in the wreckage
Sharpening your wings
Withstanding dangerous oppression

Young being, incomplete being
Trying not to succumb
To your own capitalist appropriation
Eminent commodification
Implicating your body and mind

Who remained unscathed?
Who wreaked the havoc?
Just...so many wings could gain wind
In this cage, lacking space

System simply cannot withstand
Cost of everyone's liberation
Convenient systematic predilection
Where some are never meant to fly

Miracle you bore
A refugee in the wreckage
Sharpening your wings
Withstanding dangerous oppression

How can any wings soar
When the trail of their shadows
Hide systematic traps for our failure
To ensure only a few course the skies

Liberation is not meant to be
Just yours or mine
No commodity for private consumption

Its usage, embrace, and appropriation
Has universal implications
A radical transformation that seeks to complete a human being
Emblematic of an ideological reconceptualization
A revolutionary new understanding of being human

A re-authentication of our own liberation
Purely predicated on that of others
June 4, 2013
Emanuel Martinez May 2013
Teasing the beast
Looking for a feast

Hounds barking at our ears
Vultures flying up ahead
Circling a bald eagle's fresh corpse

Compartmentalizing symptom after symptom
To hide the great systematic sickness
Labeling the suffering, outcome from desire

We, wholeheartedly accepting being
Appropriated, labeled, discarded
As construing our own oppression and sadness

Enduring the **** of our minds
Being castrated of our consciousness
Before we reap the products
Of its bold liberation and grandness

Its the belly of the beast
And its hungry
Insatiable, amoral entrails
Hoping to salvage a feast
From the casualties of d(e)moc(ratic) wars

Hoping we feed our monstrous fear
Thirsting for the greed
Dripping off of accumulating wealths
Impatiently waiting, we keep parceling out grudges

Disfiguring our minds, our souls, and our bodies
Its misanthropic nature lashes out without conscience
Knowing we'll never realize we are masses

Disappearing the individuals who realize their suffering
Ensuring there's no collective opposition or action
Trying to reassure we are weak

Knowing at some point or another
We all act mute, deaf, and blind when anyone experiences:
Oppression
Pain
Silencing
****
Hunger
Fear
Violence
­Repression
Retaliation
Discrimination
Torture
Negation
Alienation­
All forms of mental, psychological, physical, and spiritual mutilation
Fearing death more than fighting for necessary abolishment
Preferring to live out our veiled miseries
Endorsing their continuance
Instead of risking our lives for everyone's liberation
Always ensuring the feast of the beast

By its very efforts trying to decree our very human nature
Ingraining greed, fear, animosity, and weakness as if inherent of us
All parts of its most damaging weapon:  the seed of discord
Its implantation, a socialized deep desire for self-preservation

Sheep bleating painfully toward our ears
Vultures flying up ahead
Circling a bald eagle's fresh corpse
Signifying the impending recapturing
Of our true transformative desires
May 4, 2013
Apr 2013 · 2.4k
Thunder Birds
Emanuel Martinez Apr 2013
Thunder birds
Feathers made of light
No crashing in the night

Heedless heals shatter the ground
Muskets silencing every warning

Thunder birds
Voices carry out songs
No silence in the oblivion

Hollowed breathing gasping oxygen
Bullets' sonic reverberations
Overpowering every whimpering

Thunder Birds
Witnessing every crime
No veils cloud the terror

Burning images through tears
Weapons of desolation spark
Smoke and fire to blind just eyes

With every burning desire
We were meant to love
But instead fell low

Construing our delirium
As if by predestined design
Without faulting the system
Facilitating issuance of our sickness

Restless voices trivialized
To demobilize their power
Appropriating oppression as ours
April 26, 2013
Emanuel Martinez Apr 2013
When we think about the choices in our lives
When we fight and we bicker and become bitter
When we think there is only power or powerlessness

If we can realize that there is power and powerlessness
Then haven't we began to acquire consciousness
In that instance haven't we began the process of choice

That there is those who have not have given birth to this consciousness
To those who have only lived powerlessness
And know nothing else
Haven't you owed them part of your consciousness
That you have ceased to be one of them
Or your mere power has denied one of them

That there is no choice for them
Because they haven't birthed that consciousness
And if you choose power they'll remain powerless
Because within you there is no loyalty, right?
It is a choice predicated by an erroneous concept of self-preservation

It is a treacherous dichotomy; doesn't make sense
This is not an indictment of your desire not to suffer
Because surely to hold power would cease your suffering
But it is this type of power that thrives on the proliferation of powerlessness
This conceptual understanding of what it means to have power
That is not what we've come learn, but readily ascribe to

That a mind and body can cultivate power
That can be harvested, shared, communal
For the sole purpose of the survival of the other, not the self

That that can survive in this world is impossible
Its antithetical to the modes of production
In which our societies operate and thrive

How can workers begin to derive power from their collective efforts
How can workers' purchasing power equal the power of the production of their labor

How can any community in any corner of the world escape
The misanthropic missions of first world free trade capitalism

When will we reclaim our escaping humanity
When will we cease to keep feeding the system with our minds, our bodies, our labor

How much longer can we become fodder, scraps, waste feeding the machine
And don't think that you are safe when you have made it
When you have entered the circle of dominance
Because it is then when you will loose your humanity or die

It is at that apex of power that your presence becomes
Just as dispensable as that of the powerless
Because to maintain that circle of dominance
Requires a total conversion to misanthropy

The rigor with which your power will be required
To keep proliferating powerlessness will give no break
And when you become useless, it will replace you

So that we must realize that the modes of production
That we allow to exploit us
In powerlessness, or the semblance of power
Can never safeguard our humanity

How much further will we allow power to be concentrated
So that soon we ourselves, or our children won't have a choice
Won't have the consciousness of power just powerlessness
March 31, 2013
Emanuel Martinez Mar 2013
Wake Up Wretched World,

I assert my Indigenous heritage
I self identify
With the ancestors of my continent

Identity afraid to articulate
Culture, unknowingly belonging to me
Cycle of shame now shattered

Product of love, hatred, lust, and desire
europeans plundering my mother Latin America
In chaos and violence, my skin's pigment
Has been engineered through the mestizaje
Of my Indigenous forefathers

How could I not forget my lineage
When the historical legacy of modernization
Has been to massacre the consciousness
Of where my people really come from

Erasing indigenous pride
Making Paisano and Indio
Synonymous with poverty and alienation
Insulting the humbleness
State of hunger you've left us in

Original lineage within me disturbed
So you push me to ambiguity and embarrassment
Not white, not indigenous?

Pure indigenous brothers and sisters silenced
Not an exploitable consumerist market, not in your campaigns
Not benefactors of your philanthropic development tactics
Bodies too costly to abuse, no reason to bring them
Into the neoliberal multinational corporate circuit

Constantly driving them off productive land
Because they choose to assert their identity
Live in collective communes, not owing you nothing
Waiting for them to make barren lands productive
So you can take those lands too

Not capturing an obscure history, these are not colonial times
This is the legacy of the european presence entering mother Latin America
21st century still defiling Indigenous cultures to civilize and modernize
March 14, 2013
Emanuel Martinez Mar 2013
Does it sting you if I tell you, you're a ******, a thief, and a liar by association?
Sure you've been convicted and you wear your prison tags with pride
This is not a tale, this is not for your entertainment, I'm talking about you!

Wearing your abercrombie and fitch, am I interrupting the call on your iphone!
Sure what you buy has been cleansed to hide the stench of blood and sweat
Do you know where it's made? Do you care about those who made it?

Think you got it bad? Wait until you see factory workers cry!
They can't because their tears dehydrate their malnourished bodies
Your thinking its alright to be at ease, better think twice

Panic, your self-preservation is not safe, your body's agency will soon give way
Living in ghettos, urban centers, metropolises, seeking comfort among congestion
Depositories for the excesses of humanity, fresh produce scarce, drugs plenty
Commercial, social, fashion districts hiding alley ways and misery
March 9, 2013
Emanuel Martinez Mar 2013
If (WO)men are the ones that suffer an exacerbated amount
Of the violence, the ****, the abuse, and everything that comes
with and from struggle and alienation;
it is because of their femininity that men at times
have come to believe that their contributions soften institutions.
That at times throughout history neither capitalism, neoliberalism nor revolutionary experiments like that of Cuba have placed femininity as compatible
with progress or resolution.
In which case femininity must be hidden, silenced, or displaced with no purpose or place to belong.

Thus everyone closely associated with this femininity such as homosexuals, transgendered (WO)men, and "effeminate" males, (ignoring, subverting and negating the lesbian identity because of their gender) have come to be marginalized by a structural system of exclusion.

(WO)men carrying the highest burden for originating the associative distinction

Homosexuals battling to find love by constantly having to assert their masculinity

Transgendered (Wo)men afraid of expressing their through identity.

Lesbians fighting to legitimize their own identity separate from the directives ascribed onto them by virtue of being born women.

Males who are labeled effeminate because of their sympathy toward those who struggle and are alienated.

And every other individual who refuses to deliver to give a marker to their identity and a degree to their femininity.

Hold fast in your femininity and embrace the rancor that society grants you
As a homosexual I speak with you brother and sister, not for you

Realize that our self-ascribed degrees of femininity and identity are as revolutionary and transformative, and thus necessary, as those of Che Guevara, Mohammed Ali, Harriet Tubman, or the Dali Lama.

That because we have decided to embrace our degrees of femininity, problematic to any movement, at one point or another, we have inadvertently decided to align our selves with those who are alienated the most by the systems in which they live.

So that in this way we must make our struggles deliberate and political. Let our degrees of femininity become legitimizing banners of solidarity for anyone who suffers in any corner of the world.
March 10, 2013
Emanuel Martinez Mar 2013
Young people can you feel the suffering?

roca wear, gucci, apple, facebook, mcdonalds, apple bee's,
honda, lamborghini, harvard, Community College
american express, pnc bank, walmart

Wage Slaves, ceos, owners, lenders, renters, indebtedness
Structural dehumanization, systematic mechanization
Exploited labor feeding blood to your hungering consumerism

Young people you are embracing MISANTHROPY!

Embracing the hate of your own humanity! Why the hypocrisy?
Wealthy children, poor children
Trying for enlightenment through education

Parents garnering wealth through the oppression of their victims
Parents garnering debt through the oppression from economic inequality
Still you invest and promote the only legitimization of your being: CAPITALIST UTILITY

Capitalism engineering unrelenting misanthropy
Vicious economic system discarding humanity
Perfecting the concentration and accumulation of wealth
With the expansion of human alienation and murderous competition

Prostituting your body to labor exploitation and consumerism
Where does your wealth end up?
multinational companies? financial corporations? military arms contractors?
Loyalty lies in their pockets, backstabbing everyday tactics
Killing you through the exploitation of your body
Because they know the birth of another proletariat or bourgeoisie can replace you  

Entities, not human, how much have they bought you for so that you cannot see!!!
Beware of these misanthropic missionaries granting your body power and agency
When your body can no longer be plundered for profit you will taste tears and blood

Young people will you deliver your forefathers and fathers
From worshiping capitalist misanthropy?
March 8, 2013
Feb 2013 · 2.2k
Madness (Sanity's Cadaver)
Emanuel Martinez Feb 2013
Face                     of MADNESS        , gather your twisted strength
Stench like sadness? (Do)n't                             confuse, its greatness
Sway through the fractures and disjointedness
      Disembodied                      manifestati­on, useless phenomenon
S(cul)p(ture)s hammered into DisFuRme/nt
Castrate salient pieces                     of that body
      Spew inhuman lexicon insinuating         i-n/co\here/nce
Slaughter the (harm)ony                   within cadence
Screech!         H     o      w      l!          Growl!
Rel(easing) murderous miseries within infected entr[ails]
      R A G E, count{less} bullets                              turning fl{ashes} of sanity to CAD(AVE)R(S)
De[generate] ripping throat of conscio(us)ness
February 24, 2013
Emanuel Martinez Feb 2013
To have learned a lot about identity, and self-negation, and alternative identities, and what it means to be an indigene, and Afro-adjacent and the concept of eurocentrism, and ideals of appearance and how they are appropriated by deliberate power structures who seek to marginalize and condemn to maintain circles of dominance…To know that we don't live outside of those circles.

It’s understandable that you've waivered over who you thought was attractive or not...naturally you are not outside of those circles of influence...and some days they put a gloss over you and might for a while convince you that we are oscillating farther and farther from the false ideals of appearance.

They put you on a spell that tells you whose beautiful, that our brown skin is not brown gold, that our eyes are not black emeralds, that our bodies’ hair must be removed, because the only hair that should be allowed to be left on a body is blond hair, because the world has taught you to think that our hair, our black hair is an alternative, an intruder.

It is an impeding and ever-growing pain to become a conscious man…one that is learning about the injustices in which he has ignorantly been a victim of all of his life.

To have thought once that I was not attractive because I was not attractive, and that I was not sexually desirable because I was not sexually desirable…

To think that the universe had devised it to be this way as if there was no conniving vice guiding these concepts of normality and abnormality…the standards of beauty and ugliness…

To come to the painstaking realization of being robbed of the truth…of the manipulating lies and biased standards of appearance that had been constructed so far back before our birth.

To realize that we are beautiful but that this fact would be one that would be negated.

A reparation that would be contested and denied, giving over the claim to legitimacy to those who judge this trial because they too have been veiled by the lie.

Recognizing that the identity as a brown, indigene, homosexual man with brown eyes and black hair (with remnants of a French grandfather who people can refuse to believe and because of that he does not care to acknowledge that part of his heritage. Realizing that that identity is dangerous to be acknowledged as being beautiful.

…Because if those that control the power structures that dictate the normality of appearance declared that that was beautiful you and everyone else in the world would never ever doubt that attractiveness.

But again that's dangerous even revolutionary because it would supplant the beauty and more importantly the power that white people (and those that aim to oscillate closer and closer to the Eurocentric ideal) gather from maintaining that dominance.

Shouldn’t we have a right to be angry and jaded? After being burdened with the truth and consciousness...we should have a right to be. It is a burden to be conscious and we should very much want reparations...The more the injustice being construed against us becomes clearer and clearer the more we must hold contempt against euro-centrism and disarm any semblance within the pride of European descent to superiority.

It’s unnerving to realize the slight that is being used on us to beat us down. These conniving power structures have managed to get under our skin and as if through remote operation have unleashed on us...ourselves.

It’s the best weapon of destruction...of control and disillusionment. Because they don't wish to destroy us, at least not until they've extracted our worth for their gain and consumption without our interruption.

We must not be unconsciously wielding individuals who think we are ugly, and who are paralyzed by a superficial analysis of what is the optimum of appearance, which we think we are not.

Abhor the inability that has been forced onto us, to declare we are beautiful.

That the weight of the lies, the farce, the systems of marginalization as they apply to appearance carry more legitimacy and authority, than our truth...the honest truth…

It’s asphyxiating to always face confrontations and juries who will indefinitely argue for the indictment of our ugliness.

To which deep fear and disbelief will be manifest in the paralysis of eloquence and ability to articulate an opposing argument.

The saddest thing would be that they have prevailed so well and penetrated our consciousness and conceptualizations within our minds, which has made it way easier for them to force us to see ourselves the way they see us.

Pick up like a hound those nuances among those that talk, and how euro-centrism has defiled their consciousness!

Insides can't help but churn and recoil with madness and try to say no don't do that! Stop the killing of the legitimization of your and my beauty!

Don't ever be apologetic. Just know that this is something that troubles us and is complex. Concede to the fact you won't ever have to suffer the injustice that us and other brown and black people have to try to subvert and alter as part of our journey toward the empowerment of all human beings.
February 10, 2013
Emanuel Martinez Feb 2013
What are we scared of?

Fending off hoards of oppressed human beings
Of acquisition, of possession, of autonomy, of legitimacy
Never been anyone; why empower them now

Legitimized crucification
No exoneration for grave transgression
Morality of mankind stabbed, under siege, defiled
Integrity constantly bloodily ***** like the virtue of women during war
Transgression, nonetheless, legitimized not by the law of a god or science
But that of a righteous m/an

Bodies without agency traversing into illegitimacy
Becoming illegal human beings
Transgression thrusting them into humiliation
Derailed, deprived, dehumanized
Earning rights to hunger, sickness, homelessness in the eyes of civilized man

Growing global economic hubs welcoming
Illegitimate bodies with contempt, violence, violation
Don't belong, lives becoming expendable, adversary to structured society

Trafficking, dragging, trading disempowered labor across meaningless borders
Nationalists disregarding with much pride illegitimates' desires for life
Killing them after you've beaten their soul, in negligence, extracting the fruit of their labor

Xenophobia killing Japan, dying refusing to open its borders to starving workers
When will a muslim sister in headscarf travel across ALL Europe without discrimination
Be careful America, you're murdering liberty's meaningless oath to the homeless of the world
Preaching the birth of the greatest nation on earth on the backs of immigrants across time
When it refuses to cease the political firing of condemnation against displaced human beings

Greatest plunderers of this world, those who set the rules, guarding their loot
Having had displaced black, colored, and brown bodies across time
Abducting black bodies from mother Africa
Contaminating mother America's native bodies with the corruption of whiteness
Causing mother Asia to discourage its pores from allowing the mobility of bodies

Greatest plunderers of this world, those who set the rules, guarding their loot
Legitimizing their stolen appropriations for the world to see
By excluding those they extract the wealth from
Displaced bodies achieving transnational identities in pursuance of unreachable wealth
For far too long trickled out of their home nations
To build the wealths of the new homes they're delegitimized from

Every country great or small falling in line with border policies
Desperate developing countries much too worried to contain fleeting flocks
Developed and thriving nations too ready to ****** the souls of bodies without agency

World's population imploding
Countries' power structures hungering to exploit the oppressed within their borders
Majority of us peasants, poor, without agency, moving across borders
Everyone's in danger of falling in line with the masses
Or the monopolistic governments deliberately creating monstrous line divides
February 4, 2013
Emanuel Martinez Feb 2013
Raw flesh drenched in alcohol
Burning numbing till paralyzed, keeps me still
                         Power you have over my being, keeps me fearing

             Your presence destroys me, shatters me
Feeling naked, inadequate when my eyes see
My reflection's negation in you
Cannot hide anything when you expose all of me

Wounded animal beaten without avail
Knowing, proprietor of my pain
               You don't understand my whimper, wail?
My blood being diluted by the sweat of your laborious efforts
Precociously tactful, inhumanly strangling my will

Ever-becoming antithesis to facades, fears, farces in me
Facing scalpels and clamps to my insecurities, my tactics, my pride
Leaving me open not caring if I'll die from exposure
                    Caring only that you're exposing the real me

I-nvoluntarily l-acerated, o-n the v-erge of e-nding u-ndone
Somberly Always Unsettling Leaving me bare
February 4, 2013
Emanuel Martinez Feb 2013
No option, but to be perceived
Violent, Aggressive, Irrational
Identity becoming an other

Words of malice, they mystify
Words of ignorance, they vilify
Subverting consciousness and articulation

Our identities, fighting to be
Autonomous landscapes
Hoping in anticipation for liberation

No real notion of we or me
Implicating it's inhuman to be foreign
When they represent as much of we and me

Scandalizing alternative identities as subversive
Advancing erasures in favor of hegemony
Propaganda favoring what is most white

Amelioration for the obliteration of cunning identity?
No more cooperation, ****** the euphemisms
That cover up, and help justify marginalization

Our identities, fighting to be
Autonomous landscapes
Hoping in anticipation for liberation

Time to ****, ******, massacre eurocentric ideology
We preach no violence, being not them, just we
But cannot request to be free, must tear it out by force

Eurocentric ideological pandemic inhabiting, inhibiting the soul of mankind
Unthinkable abomination concealed in the veil of appropriated minds
Necessitating exorcism for the incarcerated conscious mind

When we completely violate mandates of eurocentric ideology
When only we appropriate our own identity
When we all nullify the color of our skin
As profanity or inadequacy

Our identities, fighting to be
Autonomous landscapes
Hoping in anticipation for liberation
Will be awaiting purgation from alienation
February 1, 2013
Emanuel Martinez Jan 2013
Graffiti, Graffiti, Graffiti
Being bled onto
The landscapes between thighs

Incarcerating women's wombs
Justifying men's genes
Foreigners appropriating
Women's and men's sexualities

Losing the power to be
When changing our roles' long overdue
Gendering our words and attitudes

Man, who taught you to be a chauvinist!
Woman, who taught you to be a *******?
Don't put your god in gendered bigotry

Do man's emotions feminize him?
When will women freely carry torches!

What gender do you assign this voice?
What gender do you assign this words?
Will the masses even understand these choices?

Don't worry, my sexuality won't infect you
Criminalizing sexuality
Placing it front and center, implying that's all I am

Graffiti, Graffiti, Graffiti
Being bled onto
The landscapes between thighs

Graffiti, defiling the masses not high classes
Because men and women of society
Full of stride, take pride, in their gendered hyde

Graffiti, defiling the masses not high classes
Ignored hoods, barrios, countrysides, ghettos, projects
Devouring women's and men's bodies

Younger and younger people falling to ***/AIDS and STDS
Vaginas receiving the violence, wombs bringing misery
LGBT youth ****** into fire
Lost males (in mental chains) ****** to assert their manhoods

Graffiti, Graffiti, Graffiti
Full of dangerous chemicals, being sprayed onto
The landscapes between thighs
Attempting to legislate our stories, without warrant
January 29, 2013
Emanuel Martinez Jan 2013
Cada ves que te mirava
Carisia queria darte
Esa carita linda

Amor como te queria
Nunca deje de amarte
En mi corazon gotas de sangre
Cuentan en la eternidad
La profundidad con la que te quiero
Como un reloj de arena eterna

Pedesito de mi alma
Cada momento de existencia
Tu tomas contingo

Que increible la vida
Saber que puedo amar
Pero como tu me rechasas

No quiero amar a nadie mas
Por que la perfeccion que yo busco
Esta escondida dentro de ti

Tras tu rechaso, me vuelvo loco
No entiendo las cadenas
Que me atan a ti
Sin rason, sin autonomia

Mi cuerpo, mi alma, y mi mente
Se atan sin mi permiso
A la idea de tu amor

Como quisiera correr
De la carcel de tu corazon
Donde mi amor esta escondido

Amor como te queria
Nunca deje de amarte
En mi corazon gotas de sangre
Cuentan en la eternidad
La profundidad con la que te quiero
Como un reloj de arena eterna


Pero todo lo que mi ser expressa
Esta fuera de mi control
Cuando me quiero escapar
De lo que siento por ti

Mi mente piensa de ti
Mi alma te siente aqui
Mi cuerpo añora tu carisia

Cada pena que mi corazon
Acumula por ti
Me deja en parálisis
Y no se como puedo escapar

Amor como te queria
Nunca deje de amarte
En mi corazon gotas de sangre
Cuentan en la eternidad
La profundidad con la que te quiero
Como un reloj de arena eterna
January 27, 2013
Emanuel Martinez Jan 2013
Concrete full of blood
Skies, smoke-filled clouds

Poison, don't you see
INDUCING VOMITING
Of every freedom you hold

Incubators, landfills
For
Food deserts
Soul Scavengers
Bullet and knife showers
Parentless parents
Starving children
Hotbeds for addiction

Metropolises
Harvesting humans like ants
Where democracy manufactures
Oppressed consumers out of the masses
Majority starving for death

Poison, don't you see
INDUCING VOMITING
Of every freedom you hold

Those borders you revere
Hijacking your body and mind
Legislating no burning of the flag
Where they clean their blood-drenched hands on
Can you tell what side your on
When you agree, they hold a different nationality

When can there be actual solidarity?
Profets of freedom, alienating OUR power to be
When in doctrine, legislature, and policy
Hierarchizing who deserves to be free

In contempt, not compliance
In pain, not numb
Reactive, not inactive
Burning, boiling, shivering
Out of injustice

Poison, don't you see
INDUCING VOMITING
Of every freedom you hold

How can you keep suffering,
When you face the truth
January 22, 2013
Emanuel Martinez Jan 2013
How much pain
Can one heart take
Burning battle scars

Every time
I don't hear your voice
I'm lost

How could I fall so far
Always afraid to kiss you
Now there's no you

Aimless and alone
Hell in my heart, an upheaval
Power of my being, without appeal

Granting you freedom
How could you still steal
The whole of me

Shadow of me, walking
Acknowledging the best of me
Stored deep inside of you

Everything else is hopeless
As no distance or time
Has murdered my love for you

Veins chocking, turning blue
As my heart walks about within you
Leaving me here dying, its true

Aimless and alone
Hell in my heart, an upheaval
Power of my being, without appeal
January 22, 2013
Emanuel Martinez Jan 2013
Matters of love, you’ve reaped into me
Dynamics of knowledge, richness and profoundness
Bringing age to my heart

Knowing love and knowing brutal pain
More real, more powerful, more beautiful
Gifted consciousness filling missing part of potential
Crumbling down our incompleteness

Loving you more than consciousness of my thoughts will allow
More than the passion of my intensity
To be a model of human brilliance
Manifests within the existence of my being

I am a furnace
You are the only flame
Sparking this wild fire

I am a candle, inanimate,
You are the flicker that gives it life, light, soul

I'm am intrinsic potential waiting to be actualized
You are the catalyst of life breathing momentum into me
Through your existence

A flower, a beacon, weapon to my oppression and pain
Appropriation of your love, impossibility in my life

Immaculate potion to my sorrow
Like a wild flower
Withstanding thunder, hurricanes, and rain

An atom from another dimension
Your pulse travels through my heart and my soul

As dangerous as ore
You are the purest form
Deep underneath farther than I can explore
You are the most beautiful creation

You are the end to my means
Unconceivable new reality to my rebellion

The revolution I await
In the deepest part of my existence
Knowing it might never be

Key to my chains
Chant to my muted voice

You are the embodiment and the soul of my freedom
Always escaping from me
January 18, 2013
Jan 2013 · 1.7k
Until We're All Free
Emanuel Martinez Jan 2013
Violence in our hearts
Ignorant vice of our plans

Praising
What we read
What we see
What we hear

Acquiring knowledge we seek
Enriching others' minds
You can't always enlist

Minds are being allocated
Oppressive struggle nurtures servitude

What is your brain being allocated for?
What kind of freedom are you looking for?

Can't be one of us
If you're another capitalist appropriation
Poster child, a temporary venture

Falling in line to become another
Worker or bourgeois hypocrite slave
Isn't that why you study for?
What kind of life are you looking for?

There's no saving your soul
When your freedom depends
On chains of other men's hopes

Fighting to keep yourself, your family
Future generations being born out of you
Out of the venom of oppression and pain

Living life without concern or consciousness
Just the same as living in a prison cell
America, how many inmates do you host?

Security, don't you want a guarantee?
Your family may now have peace
But when you're no longer here, there's no guarantee

Can't be one of us
If you don't join in the struggles of our brethren
Because our security is not guaranteed until they're all free
January 15, 2013
Jan 2013 · 1.9k
Embodiment of Brilliance
Emanuel Martinez Jan 2013
Just a little, just a small, just a bit
Exuding burst of energy
Embodiment of brilliance
Manifested in human flesh

Wondering while we walk
Trembling trying to talk
Mankind mostly marred momentum

Humanity how humiliating, hiding
Forefathers frowning, from our fabricated forget
Refusing redemption, requiring rancor and retribution  

Always armed, allured, awaiting angry accusations
Derailed doves, these daggers drag down
Losing level landings, lacerating learning's lifting

Just a little, just a small, just a bit
Exuding burst of energy
Embodiment of brilliance
Manifested in human flesh

I implore indignation, it's incarceration of our intrinsic immensity
At the core of our conception, captivating creation captured
Anyone, everyone, afraid of the amazement accrued under our armor
Profoundness, endless as the universe, favoring our existence

Just a little, just a small, just a bit
Exuding burst of energy
Embodiment of brilliance
Manifested in human flesh
January 13, 2013
Jan 2013 · 1.2k
Young Seekers
Emanuel Martinez Jan 2013
Feeling weirdness and warmth
Tingling, everywhere inside
Like something's being born

Just one kiss like a spark
Igniting young hearts' hope
A joy, a desire, a new need

This is young love

Me hugging my pillow
Wishing it was you

You holding me once
For me to wish
I'd be in your arms forever

Being wild and free
Just one kiss
And I've fallen in
January 4, 2013
Jan 2013 · 1.2k
Real Restless Revolution
Emanuel Martinez Jan 2013
We're social bandits because we will not be bought and sold
We might be tortured and we might die
But our ideas, our actions, our movement will not cease

We're growing restless, oppression pushing us to the edge
How much pain will we bare?
Will you sale out the masses to save your own soul?

Too afraid, so you obey your masters, till you're on the chopping block
Thinking you could become one of them
And you could become one of them...but not everyone

Revolution is knocking, blood-stained power structures are cracking
It's okay if I'm not individually happy, because we're not all free
We the revolutionaries, we're peacefully building the army

We'll sleep, at night, easily knowing we're challenging the powers that be
January 5, 2013
Dec 2012 · 865
From Our Sky
Emanuel Martinez Dec 2012
No, ashes no longer fall
From the sky

Those diamonds are precious
Between your thighs

And that pounding in your chest
Fossil fuel, so indespensable
Can keep someone like me full

I'm a minner ready to fall
Into you, most valuable ore

The mere thought of you
Can warm me more
Than coal or wood

You can heat my heart,
Set my body ablaze
A thousand degrees higher
Then lava consuming land

No, ashes no longer fall
From this sky

You must have come
To save me

How brave we,
Knowing love is dangerous
Knowing it can fail,
Trying with no fear or avail

My manifestation of love,
You rise from the shadows
Letting me know I can be yours

Like warm water dew drops
I see you trying to attempt
To hydrate, fortify this force of nature

No, ashes no longer fall
From our sky

Taking it one precious step at time
If our paths allows us
Like two cells engineering one being
Living one life knowing we have each other
December 28, 2012
Dec 2012 · 1.2k
Looking Up To You
Emanuel Martinez Dec 2012
Looking up to you
I was a tiny light
Choosing to show you
How bright I could shine

Every spark through the laughter
Every tear through the pain
I shared with you
Not knowing you could change me

Like two pebbles in a stream
We never meant to
But we flowed through together
Two friends arm in arm

Not afraid of where
Our paths would take us
Your love like a compass
Keeping me confident

And if we go through war
If my memory somehow fails
If we get lost, and you perish without me knowing
I'll be consoled knowing in my life
You have helped me grow

Looking up to you
I was a tiny light
Choosing to show you
How bright I could shine

You held me up, eye to eye
"Don't shy away from who you are"
In his eyes, I was who I was meant to be
Relying on my strength to be alright

Could you ever imagine
The ways our lives would change
How large were the ripples you made
Encouraging someone like me to be bold

Looking up to you
I was a tiny light
Choosing to show you
How bright I could shine
December 15, 2012
Dec 2012 · 818
Our Mingling Lips
Emanuel Martinez Dec 2012
Hey there! There's no time to worry
Sure I shoulda kissed you
Coulda held you, shoulda shown you
How right I was for you
                  
How shy was I, how loud were you  
All the trouble it coulda caused us
To lock our lips together
No, no problem, just endless possibilities

Couldn't gift my kisses, to your lips
Our bodies having trouble
Staying close, hip to hip
Without your lips cooing in my ear

My lips quivering, sensing
You inching toward me
Fell off balance, off center
Giggling till you backed away    
                          
Guess it wasnt meant to be  
Because having had given
First kiss away, it wasn't you
Still it filled a good part of me

And after this kiss, we're both sill alright
Still friends, sill fond, still moving on,
But living on
December 14, 2012
Emanuel Martinez Dec 2012
***** water lilies
Fiery wondering thoughts
Precise eagle eyes

Ego, they guard

Mankind better run
Material eating; nature
Purifying souls

Change's gaining ground
Man you're going down
Always thinking weaponize

Raising minds' vice
Fast blind downfall

Self-inflection; death's allure

Trapped man
Life's insecure

Hunting own kind
Fools reigning mad
Blood drenched rule

Cycle mind around
Sense losing force
Just ****** man

No blink, grant death
Leave fellow man
Only one win

Mankind better run
Material eating, nature
Purifying souls

Change's gaining ground
Man you're going down
Always thinking weaponize

Human demise
You canonize
Only trivial

Mankind better run
Man you're going down

Child keep up
For you, we're waiting on
December 14, 2012
Emanuel Martinez Dec 2012
In our life, time won't matter
Ooh don't you worry baby
I'll be right here waiting for you

In our future, I see we'll be together
Ooh don't you fret baby
Right now, we might be too young to settle

In our world, there will be no trouble
Ooh don't you get scared baby
You'll be alright till I come safe you

In our thoughts, there will be no words of sorrow
Ooh don't you think too hard baby
My lips will one day capture you

In our hearts, appropriations will be on loan
Ooh don't be too quick to sell out baby
When I come around, you'll be mine forever

Ooh don't you worry about me baby
Stop thinking about me, until the time is right
I'll always be here for you

Until that day, to have loved you
Is what I'll be proud of, Is what I hope for
Even if I don't know who you are

Till that moment when I know you are
I'll be ready; happy knowing you exist
December 11, 2012
Nov 2012 · 2.0k
Ode to the Immigrant Child
Emanuel Martinez Nov 2012
I’ve reflected a lot about desperation.
We as undocumented students
who have such high expectations of ourselves have this desperate
desire that quite frankly strips our ambitions of malice and of hidden
agendas.
We will be lucky if we are able to take the next step in our
precarious/ uncertain paths.

Therefore, our intentions have to remain
as genuine (and thus more pure; more powerful) since we are at the
mercy of those who help us continue to crawl along to our dreams.

That
hunger, that desperation, that desire and how it has pushed us, has
propelled us to the point where we have shed tears, and perhaps blood;
and as a result we have showcased a sincere and humble brilliance and
authority in our ability to thrive and succeed where it is virtually
impossible.
November 8, 2012
Oct 2012 · 472
WE
Emanuel Martinez Oct 2012
WE
I keep thinking of you
No, I wasn't expecting you
Who would have known

You were so close
I want to kiss you
I want to hug you
I wanna hold you

This first time
Felt so familiar
Like we knew each other from long ago

And I held on to you
Stayed right there close to you
Let you touch my lips
Wrap your hips, with fast grip

You gave me one kiss
When shyly I said I didn't know how
And then I couldn't stop from searching for your lips
Kissing every feature of you

I keep thinking of you
No, I wasn't expecting you
Who would have known
I would be here with you
Oct 2012 · 1.4k
Not A Single Time
Emanuel Martinez Oct 2012
Every time you tie me down
Every time you hold me up
Every time you breathe warmth down my spine
Every time you sound so kind

Not a single time
You hold back
All the bravery in your heart
You pour over mine

Once you rise
Once you wake
Once you've let your thoughts fly
Once your heart's filled

Not a single time
You quiet down
All the words in your heart
With them, you inspire me

When you dream at night
When you daydream in the afternoon
When you ponder about life
When you inhale, exhale, breathe

Not a single time
You get sad
All the happiness in your heart
You transfer in smiles and laughter to me

All you have may be nothing
All the world can go crazy
All we can hold on to, may be we
All we can do, is be free

But never will you be afraid
To give me
All the love in your heart
Knowing you belong to me
October 24, 2012
Oct 2012 · 1.6k
Banquets of Contempt
Emanuel Martinez Oct 2012
I was broken, I was severely unafraid
Nothing mattered anymore
Because I had already lost
My family and my friends

And my depression was kicking in too hard
I wasn't trying, I wasn't caring enough
Love was never enough
Though there it was in overwhelming amounts

I never belonged to anyone
No one ever lived for me
And life was being suffocated from me
That emptiness within me was bruising me

How polite, how unapologetic
How fast, hurdling down, my decisiveness
I started tumbling down, without fear
Shameless, without nerves or apathy

I was brilliant in the limelight
But behind the shadows I was being swallowed
By anonymity and solitary confinement
The darkness was strangling me

I left everything I was, to reach everything
I thought I could be
Didn't I get everything I wanted?
Yeah, I thought this was the plan

But I became someone else
Other desires became attached to me
My heart changed, my mind bent, my thoughts evolved
I lost focus, in sight of love and desire

I never bothered to figure
What it meant to be happy, within me
The work was tedious, but only on the exterior
No time allotted to the dwindling interior

I was broken, I was severely unafraid
Nothing mattered anymore
I could be starving a thousand times more
I've been disillusioned many times more by banquets of contempt
October 12, 2012
Sep 2012 · 1.4k
Shattered (No More Promises)
Emanuel Martinez Sep 2012
Its been two years
Two days, two hours
There are no more promises
I have shattered every last one

  How endless have our tears rolled
  How long did it take me to lose you
  How long did it take you to love me
  I've lost count, once, twice, once again

You got around to getting me
I got around to making you...happy
We were both very free
Everything in an instant working

  How very quick I lost grip
  We were both human, both indecisive
  You are special, no one will alter that
  Reminding me of everything wonderful

Its been two years
Two days, two hours
There are no more promises
I have shattered every last one

  Remember when we got on each other's nerves
  We squandered several episodes on quarrels
  But we always came back to be, just we
  It was a time for us to be, to dream who we could be

Everyday, wondering why I would leave
So irrational, inconceivable how lost I appeared to be
Thinking being just me, not we
I would carry on, just as free

  But I didn't know , you were meant for me
  It took too long too love you, to show you
  To share with you everything that I wanted from you
  And you wanted time to see

Could it be that we were there, us
No titles, no appropriations, we could've of
Just let it be
Why was I in such a rush, you at my side

  Its been two years
  Two days, two hours
  There are no more promises
  I have shattered every last one
September 28, 2012
Sep 2012 · 1.0k
There Was A Day
Emanuel Martinez Sep 2012
There was a day
When you confessed
That you could have loved me

There was a time and a place
When you finally expressed
Everything that you thought of me

Your words finally unleashing
Feelings your heart was too afraid to tell
Wondering if I would take them in vain

You finally gave me a chance
To hear everything you had to say
Even if it was too late

There was a day
When you confessed
That you could have loved me

There was a time and a place
When you finally expressed
Everything that you thought of me

The experiment was done
So you let everything out
Because you wanted me to know...

How much you really did care
How there were hidden words
How much you really admired the ways that I loved you

There was a day
When you confessed
That you could have loved me

There was a time and a place
When you finally expressed
Everything that you thought of me

Ooh, how only if someone took their time with me
They would see what you saw in me
And I would be unafraid

There was a day
When you confessed
That you could have loved me

There was a time and a place
When you finally expressed
Everything that you thought of me

How I was caring, thoughtful, romantic
Unlike anyone one else, very loyal
How intelligent, supportive, and fearless

There was a day
When you confessed
That you could have loved me

There was a time and a place
When you finally expressed
Everything that you thought of me

That I could have made you complete
And know I think
That you could have made me complete

But I thank you for declaring everything to me
For making me realize
That love is meant to belong to me
September 21, 2012
Emanuel Martinez Sep 2012
Needed someone to love
someone to hold,
someone to fall for

Couldn't I have told
You, that I wasn't cold
Out of my mold
I could not crowl

Just a little bold
That's what I needed to be, lord
To confront the world

No treasure, silver or gold
Too young, I wasn't that old
To take consideration,
And of your love behold

The world distorting your peace
Your true self I could not uphold

Couldn't you have managed to hold
Hold onto me through madness and massacre

How could I have  believed
We had no enemies
When all I saw was war

Our chances were rigged
Our chances were not ours to deal
Our places were not opportune
Our cards were long fortold

We held onto the unattainable
We fell to the struggle from within

We were fighting hard to rebuild
What had already failed,
Thinking the helpless
Could reverse their inevitable fall

In the questions, desperation, and pondering
No catharsis, no purging, avails
All the true revelations are lost

Only un-resourceful quiescence stalls
September 20, 2012
Sep 2012 · 1.0k
Our Bodies Floundering
Emanuel Martinez Sep 2012
How hidden, how high
How low we search without
Fear or nerve; enamored we scout

Not withstanding our falling out
Every impossibility we seek out positively

No scandals, no scoundrels
We're faced with yearning, grand dreaming; how lavishing

Pouring out every word, every feeling, every tear, every melody
Here theres no melancholy, only harmony

Counting every day, every hour, every minute
Listening to sweet musings
The chords are thundering

We've been lost, no longer wondering; we're hollering
Leaving the world swirling

How crazy we are, not suffocating
Blind, falling we're mindless faltering
But we're mindless just humming happily
August 8, 2012
Sep 2012 · 1.5k
The Conqueror
Emanuel Martinez Sep 2012
How come your body of warmth
  Boulder of boldness and hope
    My limbs in vain, fold
      In and out of its hold

Smoothness and strength
  Making me hang stealthily below
    As the muscles in your arms
      More than tickle, grip, supporting my back

Frolicking, commanding every enclave
  Exploring this landscape with precise measure and expertise
    Cherishing every arch, every curve, every carving
      Like the greatest monument,
        You guard me against all elements

And every time you press this lips
  Cautioning against the unleashing of nirvana
    Tinkling with mere existence
      There's a launching of infinite catharsis

Even when this land becomes regimented and bound
  Enclosing every possible escape
    Encroaching, expelling the very efforts to liberate
      You pause in front and gaze into the power of my eyes
        Extracting every trace of repression and restraint

Canvasing, surveying the infinite value of this place
  The conqueror, the lord, the trustee of this land
    Has come to stop pondering the chase
      He's built the greatest monument, he never planned
September 18, 2012
Emanuel Martinez Sep 2012
By the time we die
You're gonna be tired,  asleep, and satisfied
My love will have made you sick
Because it was too intense

No stratosphere will keep us safe
I will become insane
As my feelings spiral out of control

You will have no option my dear
But to maintain an everlasting fever
Because my love,
Will warm you like the hottest arab sun

And every mistake I've scarred your heart with
My eternal dedication will erase
Every day of my life as I pronounce your perfection
This perception  will never change

Like a controversial revolutionary anthem,
The beat of my heart will pledge allegiance to you

And you'll have no where to escape
As the loud boom of my love drowns out our past
You will have no choice but to die with this love

You're gonna be tired,  asleep, and satisfied
Because my love will have made you sick
As it becomes volatile and intense
September 15, 2012
Aug 2012 · 1.3k
The Flight of Our Train
Emanuel Martinez Aug 2012
If the echoes in my head subside

When the train finally halts
And I look all around
Wonder if you will be there
Will my heart still yearn for you

My mind flying high in your sky
Will it ever stop
When it finally descends
Moving forward, but moving on?

Can we derail, decelerate the pace of a loving heart
Some weaker, semblance of fuel, my engine's funneling
Will I ever fly the same without your gravitational pull

When the train finally halts
And I look all around
Wonder if you will be there
Will my heart sill call your name

Dirt and debris hitting the surface
You were the cleanse keeping **** out
Will anyone else give me your wonderful phrases

Keeping me lighter like I would amount
Healing my wings, always keeping them fearless
I never knew I needed you to fly
Now I wonder if my heart can start
When your no longer there

Keeping my engine safe and strong for war
The new ware of my flight
Will it ever resemble the speed or freedom your sky gave
When I'm no longer holstered up by the tracks of your love
Will your traces really fade away

When the train finally halts
And I look all around
Wonder if you will be there
Will my hearts still holler your name

Will it hold on in vain
Even if I'm in my grave
Will it move on, see you, and manage
Knowing our love could be gone
August 24, 2012
Aug 2012 · 1.1k
(Us) We'll Be Long Gone
Emanuel Martinez Aug 2012
When I die alone
When you finally come home
There will be no point
(Us) We'll be long gone

As kids we thought we could
So we left each other behind
Surely someone else would enter our mind

The pain we've pinned to the wall
But our love we said it wasn't real, we let it fall
Cowardly, debased we withdrew

All the while salvation we knew, not
Disappearing from each other
Can we alone hold over?

When I die alone
When you finally come home
There will be no point
(Us) We'll be long gone

Emaciated by our hunger and our fear
We forgot how to bare, how to fight
How to fly in love not in fear

Our gears were disengaged
When we lost our mind
Our lovely thoughts were caged

Moving froward, our past is lost
How much did our insecurities cost?

When my love has lost its host
And your mind, my heart's trust

Then I will die alone
When you finally come home
There will be no point
(Us) We'll be long gone
08/14/12
Jan 2012 · 1.4k
Corridors
Emanuel Martinez Jan 2012
Corridors, Corridors, Corridors
Turning corners, fortified walls

Falling dust settling on grime
Windows shattering from flying hail

Pain itemized for personal use
The heart is bleeding
From its place in the innermost cabinet

The storm is not passing
The ghostly folly is penetrating
Weakening beams through their creaking

Aimless sounds of abandon and disrepair
Are whistling silently through
The light of the sun and blanket of the moon
That seep in through the holes of the sealing

The elements of the world are caving in
As I walk through the corridors
Searching for a way out
endorsinglife.blogspot.com

January 2, 2011
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