No trespassing, the sorrows are mine
The seeing were blinkered and blind
It’s permanent, an indelibility, by star
Shimmering in the blackness of right.


Goodnight my loved ones.
Mary ***

The wind snapped in his tongue
A cruelty beyond measure
So in trembling fear she floated
Downstream to the edges of time
And in that way said goodbye
A thank you for everything.

Love Mary x

you packed your bags
and i gave you the freshly-printed plane ticket
and the taxi guy honked in front of the house
and you gave me an endearing look
and told me you’ll miss me and you’ll update me
every step of the way

and pulled me by my back toward you and
lightly kissed my lips and
you walked to the door and

held the brass **** with sadness
and i didn’t let go
of your hand..




kiss me harder before you go

I have digested the thought
of what it would mean
To lose you,
Or even just one memory of you.

I have chewed the bone
And ****** the marrow
on the mention of your absence.

And I have thought of how pitiful I would be.

Study the anatomy of me.
Find a tree.
branches reaching high and strong
To show the world how green the earth can be.
Trunk, sturdy and steady, to stand and keep standing.
Find feeling in the roots.

In the memory of us
In those I've held
And those who have held me.

Digest it.
Breathe it in.
Nurture the nuance
and open your eyes.

Do not pity the pained who have loved,
Pity the loveless that live unscathed.

Study the anatomy of me,
Find my heart,
A garden in my chest, each flower from those hearts I've held.

We cannot write silence.
The beats.
The pause.
The breath.
The way it aches
and persists

and begs that,

if only for a moment,

our consciousness is only a whisper.
our bodies,
our lips,
the air that passes through falling chests
and stillness.

A melody of emotion.
Sleeping in the quiet of a heartbeat skipped
a word lost to the wind.

The wickedness of reticence
Encapsulated in air and time.

The moment stretched too long.
Hesitation perpetuated in the grip of fingernails
pressed into palms.

We cannot write silence,
but we can try.

to find a way to immortalize emotion
to create space
in the ceaseless drone of words that speak and spin.

I cannot write silence. But I can write
tears and years
and the burn of long-stretched lies.

I can write goodbyes and hellos
And dozen ways to say
I love to hate you
Or
I hate to love you
and sometimes
I cannot tell the difference.
Silence.
The space I have upheld for myself.

I love to hate you
Heart.

I hate to love you too.

I cannot write silence.
But I know it.
and I have held it in my hand.

and we went in your moms Honda
and i called you baby the whole way and
you loved it and
we spoke some deep ish for a while about the past rather than the future
we’re both afraid for what earth has in store for us
i reassured you that i have and always will love you
and then i touched a nerve
and you didn’t want to kiss me anymore

so i kinda just watched the moon past the hill
on a boulder
and looked at the city
as a couple ants started crawling up on one of my shoelaces



we both thought about how we could’ve been kissing already.
but we’re both somewhat stubborn so none of us brought it up.

so i walked down the stupid hill
as you played with your bracelet.

I will not bleed but internally
A song that seeps into me
Celebration of misery, I will not leave
Day by day, like wild grasses, like a downpour
Wind-woven, my rooted free spirit, my primal
Lover, I owe you a favor
A cleft in our head instead of our chest
I'll forgive, let you mend, just
Stay close to me and I'll stay
I'll stay close, I'll stay