Diapers and politicians
need to be changed frequently
and for the same reasons

********

los panales y los politicos
hay que cambiarles a menudo
y por los mismos motivos

I scream
but you don't listen
your ears
must be broken

you know
like my heart

that thing
you ripped
out of my chest
and stomped on

no matter
I slept with
your little brother
and he says
"you hit like a girl"

Chocolate ice cream running
down my pudgy chin
licking it up quickly
like it's liquid sin

This sweet stuff really makes me
do a little dance
but my *** is spreading
in my yoga pants

I'm gonna have to stop it
and put it down for good
even though I hate to
I know I really should

I'll eat it in the morning
and then again at night
it's no ****** wonder
my pants are getting tight

I could pray to God in heaven
make a wish upon the moon
or stop being so lazy
and just put down the spoon