Wel come to, Oblivion
…
Wel come to O, blivion
The land, where   an gels sin
…


Even, the de   vil, does  not   know
Where, the  angels go

He,  wonders why
God takes, their lives

Why do,  the angels die?
…


How   do they fall?
Do   they feel pain?
******,   by God's grace
Dragged  by  **  ly  chains


To, Oblivion
Where they will be, for   go   tten

Even, the de vil, would know  it's,   cruel
But God likes  to   rule
Sim ple ma chines
…


Their dreams
And all their,  fears
Oblivi on tears

Their dreams
All their, fee ee ee ee eel ings
Oblivi  on fears


Drea ea ming
Fee eeling
Think    ing
**    o    ping


That's  not  God's  plan
Th­ey face God's wrath
Fa ding   a way
From all me mo   ry

Obli   vion
The an   gels' pri    son

Puppets in
Hea ea ea ea ven
Freedom chained in
Obli i i vi on

Where the    a an gels
Fa a ade away
In O  bli     vi      on

…


Wel come    to,    Oblivion
You won't re   member them
…
O bli vi on        tears

When the sun goes flame
When dried blood's no shame
One truth stands out in the shivering cold
That there is no truth in silver or gold . . .

and you can't handcuff those of the spiritual fold !

I came back to the willow tree after the amputation of the branch that was split in a square.
I thought it would be thankful that I filed for it to be cut off by the authorities who could.
I thought the tree would embrace me again.

Cause we both had to let go of things.
I thought it understood.
But I felt resentment when I came to see the tree.
It didn’t embrace me.
In fact, it didn’t even want to acknowledge me there.

Did I do the wrong thing?
I don’t think so because I read about rotting when dead branches keep hanging.
I feel that rotting every day inside of me.
I hold onto thoughts and coping too much.
And I have to try to bend or break them somehow.  

Some are most difficult to break completely.
So maybe it fell forced for the tree as well.
But I think the letting go was necessary and the tree should understand that too.

Trees like that are wise enough, you’d think.
But today I realized something different.
It was probably the way I came along this time.

I didn’t come humble.
I came with a feeling that I did something good.
And maybe that was not the best way because I should also have recognized the pain of the tree.
And I did in a way, but maybe I moved too fast towards the letting go.
Maybe I should have come with care.

With tenderness, empathy and understanding.
I shouldn’t have smiled like everything was fine. Cause I should probably know too well that it’s not just fine just because it has to happen.
It’s not easy to let go.
It takes time and great pain.

And I should have been more thoughtful about that.
So next time I see the tree, I would see the pain and hopefully then it will embrace me like it used to.
Because we both understand that life comes with letting go but that does not mean that it’s easy.
And it feels forced sometimes.
Unnatural.
This world feels unnatural to me too.
Whatever natural may be.
It feels forced.
Forced upon me.

But maybe it’s what I need.
I will need it to move on.
But when?
And why?
I’m not sure.
That makes it extra hard to trust in the process. But that’s all I can do.

I got no other choice in a matter.
I’m not happy about my impatience.
I wish I could just close my eyes and take a long time.
Drink my beer in meditation with small sips.

I try.
It’s the best I can do in this moment.
Just trying to take it really slow.
Some things can wait.
And somethings keep trying to alert me.

And sometimes when I find peace in waiting, then there’s also distracting noise.
Always something.
To do, to deal with.
Or not to deal with if I could only let go.

fish, locally caught
a neighbours gift

still wriggling
just as smeagol likes them