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 Feb 2016
Little Bear
It is of my opinion that you have desisted in truthiness.
And as such,
you will hence forth be known as a
'Teller of Untruths.'

As a result,
I do believe your trousers have combusted.
You are a blaggard and a rapscallion.
Good day...
Ha! liar liar, pants on fire!!!
 Feb 2016
lluvia de abril
He was a man who stopped time
stretch a second in love
as much as he wanted

This was not the case
for Saturday traffic
he left before she got there

Sitting at the corner table
she ordered a cup of coffee
-for here-
in case he returns for that napkin
that napkin inscribed in chocolate

"I waited, you never got here
this flower is yours, if it's alive
when you find it
water it"

She did and drove home
against traffic with just a note
and a flower

Oh, if only the man that stops time
could also take care of traffic!
I do hope everyone finds this one funny. I have been told many times that my sense of humor is simply off, but I keep trying ;)
 Feb 2016
The Dedpoet
You buy flowers and a card as an excuse to write a poem, even though you're single.

2. When " How Do I love you, let me count the ways"... And you literally lost count.

3. When Cupid calls you corny.

4. When you make a poem out of those little heart candies.

5. Cupid throws up a little in his mouth after reading your exceedingly sweet sonnet.

6. You bought your kid Valentines day cards for his class and wrote haiku's on every one.

7. You ponder the box of chocolates, and how it is like life, though it sounds familiar, you title your poem "Life is Like a Box of Chocolates".

8. You buy roses and a card filled with your sweet words for your ex, though she calls you a stalker, you are glad she called you.

9. You recite Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, and you're in the shower.

10. You suddenly bulk up on Pablo Neruda, ready to take on the romantic world.

11.As you look at your hellopoetry site while driving, you see a smear of blood on the windshield, two small wings, and what looks like a bow and arrow.

12. When you write a poem and have no one to give it to, suddenly Mom is the best Valentine ever.

13. When you go on the big date, secretly you have your own penand paper in your back pocket, writing verses when you excuse yourself from the dinner table.

14. When you write a poem for your wife, your side girlfriend and your mistress, just because it feels romantic, it is Valentines after all.

15. When you give the wrong poem to your wife, instead of the mistress.

16. Your girlfriend is suddenly a diabetic due to your sweet poem.

17.When you write a poem on hellopoetry and dedicate it to your Valentine, even though you don't have one.

18. When you buy yourself roses and a box of chocolate, write a beautiful poem to yourself, you might be a romantic poet.

19. When your secret admirer is you, the secret poems don't have the same effect.

20. Last but no least, you might be a poet when you wonder if Cupid is lonely and write an invite in the form of a sonnet to see if the little guy will join you for a poetry reading.
 Feb 2016
Mark Tilford
**** !!
Life is to short to be sappy
Every day does not have to be ******
BE HAPPY !!
Moment to moment
Day to day
BE BRAVE!!
**** being gray!!
Go ahead and stray
Find a way to  
PLAY, PLAY,PLAY
Yell "Hey"
Soak up the suns rays  
**** THAT WORD NEIGH
Sing like the blue jay
Life is to **** short to delay
Everyday is not doomsday
A "HEYDAY"
With lots of foreplay
Make some headway
Lots of horseplay
On Friday
On Saturday
REST ON SUNDAY
Start over on
Monday
Continue on Tuesday
More on Wednesday
Smiling on Thursday
Sing that song on the freeway
Don't stop when you pull into the driveway
MIDAY ALL DAY !!
"BE GAY"
Live Your Life And Be
HAPPY
!!
 Feb 2016
phil roberts
My friends abroad think I'm peculiarly English
My English friends think I'm peculiarly northern
My northern friends just think I'm peculiar
But at least I've got friends

                                                     By Phil Roberts
 Feb 2016
SøułSurvivør
Lookin' for a definition
The search engine position
It's a tricky proposition
Siri's off upon her mission

The standard answer is her stance
Has she ever been entranced
By starry eyes or moon's that dance?
Without a heart...? Not a chance

But maybe in her circuit board
There's an AI song... a chord...
In her there is some reward
Her humanity restored

Maybe in her silicon mind
There's a place where she can find
A way to let go and unwind....

No.

To her, love's truly *blind
Just a thought...
 Feb 2016
Mike Hauser
I was sitting at my computer
All intelligent and nonchalant
When a personality profile test popped up
In the most interesting of fonts

I decided this might be fun
So I clicked onto the site
And right away started answering questions
On what I did and didn't like

As soon as the test was over
With my feet planted firmly on the floor
I hit the button enter
There was immediately a knock upon the door

What appeared to be three business men
All in matching suits and ties
With darkened sunglasses all around
Like Hollywood Movie Stars in disguise

Before I knew what was happening
They threw a hood over my head
And carted me off without the slightest word
Not a single Howdy-Do was said

My new found friends threw me into the trunk
Of a waiting limousine
Where just as quickly as they arrived
We all left the scene

We came to a run down abandoned  Army base
In the middle of the desert
I had the feeling that what it was that was to come
Most certainly wouldn't be pleasant

They set me in the middle of a room
As men circled all around
I knew this had to do with the test
And wondered at it was they found

When in walked "The Bossarooni"
And said don't worry son we're not here to mistreat cha
We're just curious as to why
You like anchovies instead of pepperoni on your pizza
 Feb 2016
wordvango
be a feetless floating
gill fin laden underwater
poet, My mouth would still gulp
I would recite and still stutter
all the words in fish languages
and possibly mate
with my father's daughter.
or my brother's mother.
 Feb 2016
martin
Mon  Oneday I'll be top dog
Have the sofa to myself

Tues  Chewsday all the bones belong to me
And to no one else

Wed  Walksday let's go on patrol
Throw some weight around

Thurs  Throwup day, you can clear it up
I'll sit here and frown

Fri  Dieday for the bunnies,
If I'm fast enough

Sat  Catsday, chase them up a tree
Watch them huff and puff

Sun  Funday, all of the above
For the pampered pooch
Who knows he's very loved
 Feb 2016
Sirenes
Intelligence is measured by many things
In fact there are many ways to be intelligent
I may not be able to solve a mathematic issue
To save my life
-ok if I really tried-
But I will always understand emotion
And strive to understand it's rootcause
In fact, emotions are such as the Tao
Extremely simple.
It would however take bravery
To be honest with one's self
To be fair
To find the right answers

The right answer is not always the same as the correct answer. Always do what is right

There's very little compassion
In the correct answer
There is very little humanity
In the correct answer
So choose the right answer instead
For above anything else
Are you not human too?
So in the end
If you truly want to understand something
Persuing it, will increase your intelligence
Depending on which field you choose.
Take the time to understand
Take the time to be wrong
Forgive yourself through
Your mistakes
Live within your love
You know, the one you have
For yourself

This will increase your intelligence.
Thinking out loud
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