i really was
just a quick ****
up till five in the morning
almost every night
your girlfriend neglected
was i more interesting?
or more willing
to put out?
oh lord
i'm torn in two
over my affections.
always
a quick ****
or a shoulder to cry on
a mother
or the ideal wife
you all see me as one
when i am all
and i am suffering

bitter regret! oh
deus meus!
ut quid dereliquisti me!
for the feelings are shared
and the others are still present
how could i measure up to that?
naught but a filthy villain!
foul creature!
cast me out into the ash and mark me dying
with runes
the beast
harmony
drawn in black donning
mark me not as one who has repented
but as the witch i am
for this cruelty that causes me
to be the very saccharin ******* i despise!
oh! to be free of the thumb at my temple!
oh! to be free of the thumb at my chest!
alas!
alas!
i am no one

pretty new blooms!
don't fear the ants
they are not who ***** you worst.
their bites will come
and their bites will go
but in the end, they will only take the bitter sap of you
and let your petals unfurl.
no no, do not fear them
but draw tight against the frost
who sings sweet serenades in the moonlight
and clings to you come morning
this insidious beast
will freeze your cells
and let them burst
letting that pretty pink soul
come flowing out
less sharp than mandibles
more of a constant tug
a pull
a yank
a collapse of self
do not fear the ants!
fear the long lasting dread!
and oh,
fear the cold