My soul

Couldn't yearn loud enough

For you to hear me.

Knowing death is inevitable
Is fine
Until I looked at you and thought,

*This life will one day lead
to a goodbye with an unknown
destination.

The hatred of the world is so heavy

Yet they know not why.

They destroy and lay fire
From ancient agony
And never allowed expression,
Save for the pyre.

We still fight each other
Instead of the evil heirarchy
Held over our heads.

If you can not look to the sky above
And know Him
Then you will never fathom
The opposition down below.

This is an attack on the freedom
Of your sovereignty.
Of your souls.

Burn through the pain of your ancestors and rise from the ashes.

We need every Phoenix
To set them ablaze.

My thoughts.. God is consciousness, God is all there is, God is everywhere and everything, God is light.
It is the world and the Universe.
It is me as it is you.

We are little light particles, living cells within God's body;
Yet those cells are so expansive and huge, that they themselves are Universe's!
All pieces of the giant energy Source that creates it all.

An individually unique puzzle piece,
Like that of a snowflake,
That fits in your intricately perfect spot within it all.
Everything is like layers of light, over and over, caked in energy layers that create our very fabric of reality.
And it's all One and it's constantly flowing and evolving.
He is everything and he is nothing.
What God is...
We as humans probably don't even have decent words for.

Being forced into my mind
And into my body
And into my heart
Is an excruciating prison for someone
Who grew up living
As an escape artist.

I used everything I had control over
At the time and the only thing
I had was my mind.

So every morning until the night
I'd let my mind and soul
Take flight
To cope with the monsters
I had to fight.

Dreaming in my wake
And in my sleep
Hoping that, by morning,
I wake
Somewhere safe.

You ruined my life.
My every waking day
Shattered by yelling
And the constant verbal abuse.

Nothing satisfied you.

Now nothing satisfies me.

I've run in every direction.
My daydreams tried to take me
But you wouldn't set me free,
You couldn't just be kind
And happy.

So I turned to alcohol until
It burned my insides that I realized
That it isn't fun anymore.
It's just poison and I'm useless,
Mindless on the floor.

So I chose to smoke some ****
Hoping it'd get rid of the
****** memories.
And it did..
For a while.
And now it's not the same
Because all it brings is numbness
No longer a smile and heightens the pain.

Now I'm stuck here.
Aware.
In my body and in my mind
And weirdly enough
The real world feels more fake
Than my dreams ever did.

Forever ******* miserable
Because I have a damaged inner kid.