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Monster we call protection
Hidden within our own declaration
Wealthy build and succeed
While poor find shelter to bleed
We the people isn't what we imagine
Simply a phrase causing oblivious contemplation

Disease, power, and war for what?
For the sake of being better?
**** this world, I'm done with this lett...
gently fall now
go to sleep . . . go to sleep
it's what you want, anyway
too witless
to see what tumbles into your mind
when your psyche decides to take that funnel-trip
into the curlicue-recesses you hate to find


there, on the edge of your ear sits a world
some troglodytes wait to inhabit

two inches deep into the toe of a steep-mountain
waits a hirsute creature to unlock your marsh-dreams

outside the bulge-belly of your *sick-and-*******-fat
judgment
stands an accosting evangelist to sort out your lovely-list of sin

a reticent boy reaches out to catch the flying-thing
between his fingers, he can feel the pulse of fright.. and he lets go

beyond the bland-sidelines of a mall's congested parking-lot
cries a pimply-teen, snotty-tears: get the hell out my head!

adolescent-parents make latent-choices born of lack
baby gets a cig-burn and unexplained accidental head-fall

a sufferer battles to survive the output of night-riding fiends
yet scoffs heartily at their existence in broad day-stacks

brother gabs to brothers, finds poor-sobriety in parochial world-eye
och, no matter - let little sister (s)weep succint-harmony

an unsettled-recoverer spits feverish some colourful flasher lingo-gobs
as nobody knows what threat he carries in his hacking-chest

busker-dreamer-***-star plays and plays to no-pay café-audience
it's called street-corner blues for those in the know

an ageing-dame tarries departure, yet smiles genially at all her guests
****, but are these flippin' noisy folk really related to me?

uninvited chap with wily-scythe comes by to help out some
only the sick can smell the rotting-book of his gaunt-art

there awaits a pestilence within dark-cartwheels you can't see
well, all because you're too blasted-blind to lick that-a crap-wax out!




(mind so asleep)

wake . . . UP...!


guess not, huh?
wait then.. until that moonlight slants your way again
and then, guess whose mind will be sweet-milked
and your fine-assurance be stunning-hostage
as you shut-down wide-open thoughts
the things you close debate on
in the dayyyyyyy-time..
better be ready
to daydream
into your
self




how elegiac a tribute then
to
the unwoken..


tất cả chúng ta ngủ..




S T - 25 ox-axe
axe ****** judgment of others..!

yeah, I think.. tonight - I'm a-gonna HOWL at that silent, mocking moon.. wake up all them sad and lonely-monsters inside.. I mean, who do they have to talk to.. ??
ok, relax.. joke!
                          ha ha, said the brown-cow.. mooooooh..
or.. I'll just smile politely.. again.. and wink at the night-sky :)






sub-entry: when

when will we wake up
to see
that the world is NOT
what we think it is
or what we see

when will we
wake UP..
and see that
the cloak is
so
heavvvvvvvvvvy.....


(nice self-imposed penalty.. just nice)
Head down, hopes high, this wasteland dark, wicked and twisted

Arriving "home" only to discover purple flesh canvas splatters from the figure he calls father

Repetition is at hand, the heart now torn between the crease where it had once been sown together

Compromising to this world, living for the world but the worlds not living for him

Contemplating death because there is zero life within this skeleton

Lead, gunpowder and pressure are alive while the power of powers overpowers all

Tears full of sorrow glisten down his cheek but there is a hand that wipes away tears

The oppressed are suppressed for the kingdom is here and will reign

Happiness instilled in the once torn heart now guarded by the one who guards
now filled with wine of the thirsty

Once a lost soul but never a lost cause
Son of the king walking into the light
Once fatherless but now selfless
This is the darkest that I've ever felt
You know that
You've known that for a long time
You didn't have to tell me that you cared you know
You could've taken your outing just like everyone else has
My mind has been a dark place for years
But you're just now deciding to recognize it?
*******
I'm tired of writing about you
I'm tired of caring about you
I'm tired of loving you
In all honesty
I just wish I never met you
If sidewalks could talk,
They'd tell stories
Of hurried footsteps
As I chased you down the street
And you carried me back inside again.
If hinges could talk,
They'd tell tales
Of every evening
That ended in slamming doors
And gut-wrenching sobs.
If bed springs could talk,
They'd whisper the secrets
Of the nights we laid too close
And I allowed you to stay
Until I fell asleep.
If mailboxes could talk,
They would repeat
Every handwritten letter they held
That you once poured
Your feelings into
But don't anymore.
And if windows could talk,
They'd tell you
About every night
I gazed outside
Hoping you'd come back to me
But you never did.
Its all in what I haven't said
the words I really meant
dreams I've never told you about
passions I've never shown
kisses that never made it to you
heart beats never pressed against your chest
My feelings left in actions never shown
whispers still unheard
smiles that never touched these lips
and glances that missed their mark
tonight
Your thieving fingers wandered
Over my exposed textured canvas
Absorbing my earth browns and love reds
holding them for random
Blackmailing my sensibilities  ..and
Casually tossing to the floor
I gathered my rainbow, my ocean’s so blue
Sophisticated smooth opaque blacks
         yellows hidden in  sunlight
fire and seductions of my reds
Searching the floor for every drop
scraping the remains from beneath my finger nails  
        and tuck them
Away from sight
         In a jar named reserves
Along with stolen kisses and goodnight wishes
Serving the purpose of reminding me to never forget
Your heart beating into my chest
But drumming out the sound of me living..
     Sometimes I forget that I’m breathing
I lose my self in you
    I hold pieces of your toxins  
Soaking them into my pores, seeping between my fingers
Scratching and Chafing
letting them slide between my thighs
But I don’t fight it
Eyes wide shut
  I mourn you
In my arms I hold pieces of your lies
In these arms I hold tattered broken dreams
In these arms I hold so much
that I laid myself down somewhere
    and
Absentmindedly  walked away
And I minded it absolutely
I lost myself for loving you
Don’t know if I’ll ever find me
Zombie or Monster?

Zombie's thrive for flesh
Monster's thrive to ****
Zombie's are created
Monster's are born.

The night is the time for the hunt
Day is for the epic hunter
Hunting in the public is tricky
Mobs are easily spotted
Single target's is twisted in shadows

Zombie or Monster is my question
I fall under monster
I might appear to be sane
But in reality i'm just purple.

My soul gathers the blood that spills
My heart gathers the chills
My mind filled with thrills.

The body is like a bomb
Once pushed to the limit it explodes
This is not a lethal explosion
Just the force of Truth.

Those who don't get this are UNTRUTHFUL.
A monster might ****
But the **** might just be about spoken words not humans
Zombies are the instigators watching and not reacting
They do without knowing the consequences they expose to others.

I might be a monster
But all I do is **** the silence and shred them with truth
Truth which should be spoken but is dormant within one's self.

Zombie's show no emotion
While Monsters are the Motivators towards a solution.
He lives in a time of plague.

The tag team of cholera and dedication killed his father, for all Dr. Juvenal Urbino knows, his father was faithful to both work and love.

The good doctor knew from an early age that his work would be his love, and from a slightly less tender age he discovered that his love of flesh and the body ran deeper than mere science could take him.

He met Fermina Daza in the doorway between clinical curiosity and obsession over her doe’s gait, and as he walked through his heart made room for a new kind of dedication.

He thought his devotion would be equally as precise as his practice.

Fifteen or so years of marriage, between years in Paris they bled together like a Van Gogh after a rainshower, the intricacies of their companionship were jointly held in a contractual cradle, but neither of them felt obligated.

Dr. Urbino was before my time, but my story will know the life of Carlos Mucharraz, Pre-Med major, they both dedicate themselves to their love. I’ve never seen her, but I can imagine Carlos likens her gait to that of a doe. He fawns over her from 17 hours away, for nearly a year.

Like a Texas dust devil, he sends his love through the air to Minneapolis to brighten her phone screen and her day.

They’ve only ever spent time together twice.

I’d like to think of his devotion like a boulder, immovable, but twisters slither across prairies as wicked winds push them towards seas of lust, but I’d like to think his love flew above turbulent skies.

I thought Dr. Urbino as a rock.

He must have thought of his fidelity as a disease. His father died fighting cholera, and Urbino would not let his affliction of faithfulness **** him. He thought himself ill, and the mantra of his practice taught him one thing only: cure.

In a slum of San Juan de la Cienaga, pants around his ankles, holding a mulatto girl’s legs around his waist, he crumbled like stale bread as he plunged himself into infidelity.

This man of granite broke and fragmented, his sin etched a crooked cobweb of fractures into his back, I wonder if the beads of sweat stung his spine, or dulled the pain.

But maybe I should put my faith in dust devils.

Humans may be able to shatter the hardest stone, but no one commands the sky, for it straddles North and South, East and West, Fort Worth and Minneapolis.
You are a glimmer of light in the cold dark night,
someway, somehow you make things better
 like everything is alright.
 
I’m deeply sorry for all the hurt and pain that I’ve caused,
I’m sorry for all the dramas and all of my flaws.
 
You're the girl of my dreams,
my one wish come true,
My love, my everything
 revolves around you.
 
One thousand apologies just would not do,
to fix all the trouble I’ve put you through.
 
You're the song that is sung from the angels above.
You're my sweetheart, my baby, my unquestionable love.
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