Dropping a coin into a well.  You watch it fall...

In the reflection, You see your life falling, but instead upward to the sky and
You see your body being cast far above the trees, higher than the doves can fly.

Freedom and wind soar through your mind as you notice that
being up this high, is both dangerous and liberating.

As you rest at the top of an iceberg, you are freezing and you wonder,
"what's the meaning of all of this height? Why do I seek high experiences in my life?"

And after a wrinkle or two of your brow, you slip down and float your way to solid earth.  When you reach your home again, you go inside and sit. And sit. and sit....

after some long time sitting, you start to feel something tremble in your whole body.  You sense a deep rememberance as to why you were born; why you're alive.  You don't need the highs, nor the lows.  You don't even need the middle-ground.  You don't need anything.  

This realization, as you realize, is what actual liberation is.  And just by realizing this, you are instantly a dove, flying high above the roof of your house.  But, instead, you sit and rest.  And you are content with everything in your life.  And, while resting, you know you are content.  And that's all there is.

how is it possible to have a heartbreak over someone you've never met; someone you've only imagined?

a hole lies in my heart where the mystery man used to live
this gaping wound that never happened yet, continues to tug at my fragile insides of my heart's wall, only to break my heart in half

am i inflicting unnecessary suffering upon myself? but, authentic feelings arise when i imagine your peaceful, lovely face. are you all a dream, or is this a prophetic dream, soon to become a reality?

i haven't met you yet, but i do feel you. i feel your warmth and love for me.  i feel your soft, soothing embrace when i cry.  i feel your sweet breath upon my cheek when i curl up next to you. i feel your gentle caress when you tell me you're not going anywhere. all of this is my imagination. all of these are my hopes turned into figments in my mind. but where do the feelings and rich visual pictures come from?

i will continue to have a playground in my mind, falling into my own illusions and falling in love with a man in my mind who isn't really there and who cannot hurt my heart. for he is perfect, trapped here in my mind; a perfect lover. and facing the reality is too much of a risk. so i will continue to dream and to fall in love over and over again with the pictures in my mind.

when you love someone, you sacrifice a piece of yourself to that person.  You may not want to do this, but giving your heart, fearlessly and truthfully, you lose a little bit of yourself to that person.  That person also loses them self to you.  

There comes a time when the sacrifice is too great and turns into a game or becomes unbalanced.  It is then that you have to make a decision.  How much is my happiness and self-worth or desire for self-peace worth it to having this beautiful person in my life?  What do you keep and what do you reject?  You cannot keep half a person, so make your decision.  Soon.

The heart does not give up so easily as the mind does.  You may think this is wrong, but your heart continues to shout this is real, this is true, this is right!  Which one do you listen to?  When is common sense better than passion and emotional vitality? There has to be a middle ground.

searching.... for that perfect person.  All of what I think I want I also think I cannot have and that it does not exist, yet I continue to search.
My heart cries out in pain and an aching that I cannot ignore any longer.
Is it possible to have true love at my age?  Am I too dried up and used?
There's always the "one day, one day, one glorious day, he will show up when I least expect it" *******.  

Underneath the heartache is a deeper ache.  Have I missed my chance? Is this how my life will be from now on?  Even the thought of that makes my soul crumble.  I suppose if that's what God intended for me, then sobeit.  It can't be true...

Aligned to unite
With others who lost their way
It’s a mess we perceived
To those in dismay
These lines create dreams 
For the broken
For the ones never spoken-
Of Love & Courage

Conjuring up notions of time
Structuring of desires preludes
To pursue what’s lost 
To preach and beseech truth
Faith denotes eternally
Surviving pain and deceit
What speaks only bleeds
To fabricate amity

Not fazed by power
But to denote greed
Greed of Love & Passion
Exhaling Hate & Deception
To succor the pillar of fate
To exist in this factual state

Your heart's a fragile thing. 
Everyone’s heart is. 
Don’t ever contaminate hatred
Contaminate love instead.