mens regnen siler ned bag ruderne
gemmer vi os ned i et solrigt kammer
som vi bygger under kropsvarme dyner
vi leger, vi er børn - blot for en sidste stund
vi leger at livet blot er en illusion, mens
silkebløde ben hviler mod hinanden
vi leger, vi er i paradis

Jeg ser sorte toner for øjnene
og mærker skarpe genstande mod blød hud
når du fortæller mig, du ikke længere synes,
du er min
jeg lader natten drage mig ind i ulykkelig poesi
du kysser hendes læber
imens jeg går i opløsning indeni

i get upset
when these thoughts
try to drown me
in a interminable ocean
of liquid mercury
because they does not belong to me

but then
i get even more upset
when it occurs to me
they did not belong to me
i have made them
mine

*(k.w)

"I wish you well."
                                                          ­                    



                                         ­                                     (but not too well without me)

I wonder if you’d want to know
I named all of my demons after you and
they haunt me in my sleep

when I was 14 I fell asleep in April and dreamed of bones and
I’m not sure I’ve really ever woken up since

when I lost 5 pounds I never saw a difference

when I lost 10 my mother said I was looking good

when I lost 20 she told me to stop and handed me food
and I became anemic

when I lost 25 I stopped drinking anything because
I felt water had calories

when I lost 30 my mother held me on her lap
and held my bones together for me

when I lost 35 I started fainting every morning and
the doctors could no longer easily find my blood pressure

when I lost 40 people started to stare and food made me cry

when I lost 45 it hurt to walk and to lay down
it hurt to eat
it hurt to breathe and
I started throwing up my empty stomach

the mind plays tricks on those that decide
nourishment is not needed

Eat.

Mind melted on the kitchen floor.
Open the door and use it as a door mat.
I will join you,
and then I will join it.
Scrapped under shoes
separated throughout the world.
Which part is where?
Will it ever be whole?

A hollow body searches through a town that's changed.
And hasn't.
The weather changes as much as his moods.
And like the weather,
he wakes sunny
and falls cold.

I'm sorry I don't fully understand.
I'm sorry I'm scared.
I'm sorry I can't help.
I'm sorry all I want is your help.

And it was meant to be different.
Haven't been back a week,
and already I feel worse than when I left.